Worst Jokes Ever

What operating system do Indian scammers use?

"Window licker XP."

You are walking through the woods when you cross a woman who has been raped and beheaded. What is the first thing you do?

Check your map, you’re obviously going in circles.

Your mom's like a candy machine; she pops out for anybody.

When you realize the person reading this is a clown.

Why do orphans work boomerangs?

Because it's the only thing that comes back.

What do you call an orphan family photo?

A selfi.

I was talking to a Muslim yesterday, and he asked me what it's like to be blind.

I happened to tell him about 20 jokes; in fact, I was working on my twentieth. So I answered with, "At least I don't have to screw in light bulbs. It's not like I need the damn things anyway."

Um... (no idea what joke I should tell).

Q: What’s the hardest thing about fucking a dude with a dildo?

A: Making sure he doesn’t wake up.

Fila is a cool brand. I fill a cock in your man's pussy.

Dark humor and women are very similar...

Not everyone appreciates them, but they both give everyone something to make fun of.

"Fuck the school, fuck it!"

My woman told me that she wants to have sex with me, and I said, "Let's go at it." She said, "Shut up and kiss me on all my pillows."

What kind of pillow makes sounds?

I did a bungee jump for charity recently. It was called "spastics on elastics."

Why did lil Timmy drop his lollies?

He was hit by a train.

I eat kids.

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What's the difference between my basement and my garage?

One has a pile of babies' bodies; the other has their heads.

Y’all can actually see them at all, my toe.