Worst Jokes Ever
Why was six scared of seven? Because 7 ate 9. Why was 10 scared? Because it was between 9/11.
What do pedophiles call children in wheelchairs?
"Meals on Wheels."
Q: What is found deep inside of us, and the more we express our love for each other the more it spreads throughout the world?
A: Covid.
Australian says to American: why do you have such bad gun laws?
American: Self defense.
Australian: Self defense against 50 innocent children?
Me in the middle of the night boiling water.
Me talking to my brother: How do you make holy water?
My brother: How?
Me: You boil the hell out of it.
Q: How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: I don't know, there are twenty in my basement, and my basement light still isn't fixed.
What do u call a pretty Indian girl?
Bomb bae.
What do cannibals call a person that is running?
Fast food.
A man is digging in his garden and finds a gold chest. He goes to tell his wife.
Then he remembers why he was digging in the garden...
What do you call a lion as a baby?
Cocota
There was an illegal alien woman who wanted to be called "undocumented." So, I had "undocumented" sex with her and threatened to have her deported if she reported me for rape. I'd call it even.
The weirdest thing happened to me today. I was driving 50 mph and hit a speed bump and it screamed!
Aren't paraplegics just plegics who can fly?
What happens to emo kids when they go up?
They never come down.
I heard guns kill people, so I gave up my right to own one.
Then I heard dicks rape people, so I chopped it off.
What does a priest and a clown have in common?
They both make children cry.
The doctor told me my temperature was exactly 98.6 degrees. I felt relieved until he said, “Celsius.”
What did all the humans say when all the pets left town?
A doggone catastrophe!
Q: What does your Mama and a slinky have in common?
A: They aren't much to look at, but you can't help cracking a smile when you see it tumbling down the stairs.
If you enter the bathroom as an American and leave the bathroom as an American, what are you in the bathroom?
A European.