Worst Jokes Ever
Your manna so fat your father will be coming around the mountain when he cums.
Me: Good night, everyone.
My friends and family: Night.
Me: *gets in coffin*
My family: *stares at my friends* You aren't going to do something?!?
My friends: *to my family* Nope, this is normal.
God: I feel like I'm forgetting something... oh no, Earth! *sees it on fire* Oh, it's fine.
People of Earth: *running and screaming*
Santen: *to God* Really?
I love telling jokes about orphans. I mean, what are they going to do about it? Tell their parents?
Pro tip: How to not hit your thumb with a hammer, make your child hold the nail.
One day my friend said: "I want tacos from Katie's, you?" and I said no thanks and she left. I never saw her again. Today I remember that I saw her name on TV as one of the victims of suicide, then I remember her and my motto: "If I'm dying, you're dying with me, you got no choice." I NEVER ate tacos from Katie's again.
Today was the worst day of my life. My ex got hit by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver.
POV you are drunk and telling jokes and no one is listening 😭😭😭
POV: you
Michael Jackson died of shock when he found out Boys II Men wasn't a delivery service.
Michael proved anything is possible in America. Where else can a poor black boy grow up to be a rich white woman?
You're so clapped that you make Susan Boyle attractive.
A priest, a rabbi, and a vicar walk into a bar. The barman says, “Is this some kind of joke?”
Police arrested two kids yesterday. One was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one, and let the other one off.
The only woman to ever tell you that they loved you was your mom. (If she even loved you in the first place.)
I asked the gym instructor,
"Can you teach me to do the splits?"
"How flexible are you?" he asked.
"Well, I can't make it on Fridays."
My son asked for a swimming pool so I got him a ant 🐜🐜🐜 pool.
Why don't orphans play tag?
Because there's no one to catch.
Wanna hear two short jokes and one long one?
joke, joke, jooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooke.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett? Six hours.