Need

Need jokes

Insult

Popular girl: Sorry I'm late.

Teacher: Why are you late!

Girl: I need my beauty sleep.

Nerd: Well, you might need to hibernate because you ain't pretty.

School

Why did the 18-year-old girl need a ladder to go to school?

Because it was High School.

Information

I didn't ask: ❌

I'm sorry, but it doesn't seem that anyone needed this information, and there doesn't seem to be any chance anyone will need this information in the future. ✔️

Memes

Mama

Yo mama so fat the scale said, "I need your weight, not your phone number."

Caricature

What does a Jewish man say when he sees a caricature of his face?

"We need to circumcise that one."

Lap

You need a good place to think? You can sit on my lap, and we’ll see the first thing that pops up!

Jesus

What's the difference between Jesus and a picture? You need only one nail to hang a picture, unfortunately.

Skeleton

What did one skeleton say to the other?

Skeleton 1: "I need a hand!"

Skeleton 2: (Throws up hand)

Skeleton 1: "That wasn't very humerus."

Skeleton 2: "Why do you have to be so heartless?"

Skeleton 1: "At least I had the guts to tell you!"

Viagra

Man 1: Dude, Viagra is for pussies. Real men don’t need Viagra.

Man 2: I thought Viagra was for dicks?

Mom

My mom gave my friend a blow job for good luck on his job interview, then my mom gave my other friend a blow job for his interview, and they both got the job. Now who needs good luck? Just ask my mom. My mom is a good luck charm.

Party

Why is it so hard to make a party on Earth?

Because you need to planet.

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  • Kid

    Funny jokes are like kids with autism.

    They have special needs to make them.

    Nail

    What's the difference between Jesus and a picture? You need only one nail to hang a picture.