Music jokes
What did Eminem call himself when he lost weight?
Slim Shady.
What did Jay Z say when he got pulled over?
"I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one!"
What did the Queen Bee of Destiny's Child say?
"I'm so crazy in love..."
Why do emos get discounts at every shop? Because they have barcodes on their wrists.
Can I get a Hoyah?
What do you call an emo a cappella group?
Self harmony.
I would rather be drugged and robbed by Cardi B than listen to her f***ing music.
Your favorite music artist is Cardi B? I prefer Cardi A+ if I'm being honest.
What's an orphan's least favorite theme song? The Barney theme song.
Why can't Michael Jackson ever win in a race? Because he always comes in a little behind.
Name one person who would take an orphan?
Michael Jackson, so they can play all night.
Someone asked me, "What are them scars on your arm?" I thought I was playing a violin.
What is the difference between a frog and a trombone player?
The frog might be on his way to a gig!
What's the difference between a piano, a pot of glue, and a tuna fish?
You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna.
What about the glue?
I knew you'd get stuck there.
What do Pink Floyd and Princess Diana have in common? The Wall was their last big hit.
What do Marshall Tucker Band and Kobe Bryant have in common?
Their last big hit was "Fire on the Mountain."
If a priest listens to sad music in his church, he really enjoys being deep in minor.
If you play FNF, I play a game because he has two balls, boi.
What are Michael Jackson’s sexual pronouns? Hee hee!
What song can't orphans sing?
"Sweet Home Alabama."