Steve jokes

In 2011, Stephen Hawking said there is no God. In 2018, God said there is no Steve Hawking.

Gary and Steve are having sex and the phone rings. Steve goes to answer the phone and tells Gary, "Hey, don't finish yourself until I get back." After returning from the other room, there is cum all over the bed and wall of the bedroom. "Jesus, Gary, I said not to finish yourself until I got back!" Gary turns to him and says, "I didn't, I farted."

Steve Jobs would've been a better president than Trump...

But I guess comparing apples to oranges is unfair.

Did you ever walk into Steve Hawking's house?

"No."

He hasn't too.

A grasshopper walked into a bar and sat down at the counter.

The bartender looked at him and said, "We have a drink named after you." The grasshopper replied, "Who names a drink Steve?"

This is a short joke! This short joke is long. Nice joke, Mr. Steve.

What's Stephen Hawking's other favorite song?

Steve Winwood's "Just Roll with It Baby."

Stinky Steve.

Where do you go when Steve Hawkins dies?

Microsoft.

Hello Steve!

What is Steve Harrington's favorite musical?

Hairspray.

There’s only one answer to who would win, 1996 Bulls or 2017 Warriors...

...Steve Kerr’s team.

Steve Kerr really named his son Nick.

October 1, 2017 is when the Mandalay Bay became the Mandalay spray. Thank Steve for that.

Villager: KNOCK KNOCK

Steve: Who's there?

Villager: I'm not talking anymore.

Steve: I'm not talking anymore who?

"Knock knock."

"Who's there?"

"Steve!"

"Steve who?"

Steve cries, aware that his grandmother's Alzheimer's has reached a point where she can no longer remember him.

God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.

I was in my car listening to my radio. Steve Winwood's song came on, "Just Roll With It, Baby." I said that must be one of Stephen Hawking's favorite songs; he sings it to his girlfriend.

Once upon a time lived a fat ass named Steve and got rabies and died. The end!

It's funny how Stephen Hawking sounds like Stephen walking or Stephen talking, but he can't do any of those things.

When Steven Hawking realizes heaven is only a stairway away.

You know what’s impossible?

Steven Walking.

I can't find out where Stephen Hawking is from, I just can't place his accent.