Michael Jackson jokes
What did Mickey Mouse and Michael Jackson have in common?: (What *didn't* they have in common)
Same red shorts, theme park in their backyard, white glove, soft voices, loved children, they both were black with white faces.
Me: Now I know why Michael Jackson turned white.
The police: You finally figured it out.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong?
Neil Armstrong walked on the moon, and Michael Jackson screwed little boys.
Where did Michael Jackson go to college?
Bring 'em young.
Why did you always see Michael Jackson wearing two white gloves?
Because masturbation is against Michael Jackson's religious beliefs.
What do Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common? Firstly, they both went from black to white, and secondly, they both get turned on by kids.
How do you know when it’s bedtime at Michael Jackson’s house?
The big hand is on the little hand!
What do Michael Jackson and caviar have in common? They both come on little white crackers.
Why can't Michael Jackson go within 500 meters of a school?
Because he's dead.
Why did Michael Jackson name his kid Blanket?
What would you call a cover for your cock?
What did Michael Jackson find on his bedsheets?
Billie's Jeans... Hee hee!
What did Michael Jackson find on his bed?
Billie's Jeans.
So I was in the car with my mom one time and we always joke about me being adopted (I am not), and Michael Jackson's song "Billie Jean" sounds like my name, and so my mom says, as the song is playing, "(My name) is not my daughter, she's just a girl who claims that I am her mum." Wow. *applauds for mother* Love you momma =)
Random person: Imma smack you so hard your skin pigment changes!
Me: Who the hell do you think you are? Michael Jackson’s dad?
Michael Jackson was working on a cover of a popular Elton John song when he died...
His version was to be called "Don't Let Your Son Go Down on Me"...
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
One's plastic and dangerous to play with; the other is to carry groceries.
What does Michael Jackson and a Playstation have in common?
They're both made of plastic and children turn them on.
Q: What was the name of Michael Jackson's last book?
A: The ins and outs of child rearing.
Why did Michael Jackson call Boyz II Men? He thought they were a delivery service.
Michael Jackson and Tonya Harding got together back in the day for a horse racing venture. Tonya says, "I'll handle the handicapping, you go ride the 3-year-olds."