Meal jokes
I tried to eat a clock the other day.
It was very time consuming.
I live in China and we have no food. We have to eat Chinese food, so I called my dog over.
The other day while I was going down on my grandma, I thought I tasted a little horse semen and I got to wondering if maybe that’s what killed her!
Ah, you wanna read a cheeseburger joke for your friends to hear.
Nah, bro, you're just going to get cheese on your burger.
Just shit my pants and it ran all down my legs... last time I eat at Popeyes.
What’s one thing you can say during a wedding and in bed?
I didn’t know we were having seafood tonight!
My friend and I joined a french fry eating contest, but I just couldn't ketchup. So we switched to cheeseburgers, but I still couldn't mustard up the speed to lettuce win. I mayo not have thought this through.
So we switched to fruits, but when it got to the watermelons, I started to feel a little green. My friend couldn't seed the point of us continuing anymore. I just couldn't digest the stress, I guess! :D
How do you help a starving cannibal?
You give him a hand!
What is an orphan's least liked meal? Family dinner.
What's a pedophile's favorite fast food meal?
In-N-Out of kids.
I was thrown out of the charity food kitchen on my first night of volunteering.
All I said was, "Hurry up, some of us got homes to go to..."
What would you like as your last meal?
Fried chicken. Extra crispy.
How do you make any salad a Caesar salad?
Stab it 23 times!
Why did the chicken go to the restaurant?
To eat chicken!
Me running from the table where the Emo table with a happy meal.
How did the cannibal know the girl he was eating for dinner had COVID-19?
She lost her taste.
Kids, next time you have school dinners, make sure you have something you actually like so you don't have to shove all your food over to one side of the plate to make it look like you've eaten more than you actually have.
Sandwiches are yummy! 😋
Best part about being an orphan?
Not spending 1h30 at the table every night with your dad yelling, "What's 2*3?!!" And you crying, "I don't know!!!"
What type of meat do priests eat on Good Friday? Nun.