Man

Man jokes

I once asked a sketchy man at a bar for some relationship advice. He simply replied, "They're all dead hookers once they're in the trunk."

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  • A drunk man walked out of a bar and kept falling flat on his face. He wondered why this was until his wife spoke to him:

    Wife: "Why is your face all bloody?"

    Husband: "I was so drunk that I couldn't stand up, so I kept falling on my face!"

    Wife: "Idiot. You left your wheelchair at the bar!"

    Confucius say, "man who go to sleep with itchy bum, wake up with smelly finger."

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  • What did the deaf man say to the blind man before he fell into the well?

    Nothing.

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  • Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day.

    Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

    Confucius say, man who runs behind car will get exhausted, but man who runs in front of car will get tired.

    What did the Tin Man say when he got run over by a steamroller? -- "Curses! Foil again!"

    Did you hear about the man who was accidentally buried alive? -- It was a grave mistake.

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  • Today, a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool. I gave him a glass of water.

    A man walks into a library and says to the librarian, "Do you have that book for men with small penises?"

    The librarian looks on her computer and says, "I don't know if it's in yet."

    "Yeah, that's the one!"

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