What is the difference between a rapist and a dictionary? One of them knows the definition of no.
Friend #1: "Yo guys, what's the most unfair game you've ever played? For me it's Fortnite."
Friend #2: "I'd have to say Monopoly."
Me: "The most unfair game you say? Life, definitely. Like, no one wins, it's a one-way game."
Friend #2: "Uhh...that's not exactly what he meant..."
Friend #1: *calls the suicide hotline*
If a woman sleeps with 10 men she's a slut, but if a man does it... He's gay, definitely gay.
Teacher: Johnny can you use a sentence with definitely in it Little Johnny: Do farts have lumps in them Teacher: of cause not Johnny Little Johnny: then I’ve definitely shat myself
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Is buttcheeks one word?
Or should I spread em?
The definition of a stalker is two people going on a romantic walk but only one person knows about it.
A class is being taught when Bill Clinton walks in. He asks the class, " What is a tragedy?" One kid, named Jim, raises his hand and says, "if my family and I got ran over by a truck, that would be a tragedy." Bill Clinton replies, "That would be an accident, not a tragedy." A couple of seconds later, Audrey raises her hand and says, "If a school shooting would happen and 10 kids died, that would be a tragedy." Bill Clinton replies once again with: "That would be a great loss, not a tragedy." All of the kids are confused now when all of a sudden Matthew says "If you and Hillary Clinton were on an airplane and it got blown up, that would be a tragedy!" "Yes!" Says Bill Clinton "How do you know?" Matthew says happily, "It is definitely not an accident, and certainly not a great loss!"
The teacher asked her class to use definitely in a sentence. Little Johnny raised his hand to answer, yet the teacher passed him and went on to Kevin. "The sky is definitely blue." "Very good Kevin,but the sky can also be blue or black." the teacher replied. Little Johnny raised his hand again as high as he could, yet the teacher passed right over him. And picked Annie from the back of the room. "The grass is definitely green." "Very good Annie, but it can also be brown." Little Johnny was waving his hand like crazy seeking her attention. Finally she called on him. "Mines more of a question, but do farts have lumps in them?" "Why no Johnny why would you ask such a question?" She questioned. "Well if they don't have lumps in them, then I definitely just shit myself."
Define abnormal life.
Waking up everyday living a sane life!
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a fat girl was dancing on the table and i said nice legs she says you really think so and i say yes definitely most tables would of been broken by now
If you want to SH but not in the sell farm way, come ooon.. do you even know what does that means?..
I’m trying to find out what IDK means. Every time I ask someone they say I Don’t Know
What is the definition of African-American Vienna sausages? 😋 😋 😋 😋 😋 😋 😋 😋 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 cocks of African-American men 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭🌭 🌭 🌭
Yesterday I wanted to look up the term "procrastination". I swear, I'll do it tomorrow.
A policeman found a dead body of a man on the street, he thought he recognized the body and the 2 friends he usually hung out with so he called in one of the friends. The friend looked into the dead body's face and said, "yep that's definitely Joe," but then to be absolutely sure he turned the body over, pulled down the back of his pants and said, "oh no wait that's not Joe. the policeman called in the 2nd friend, the 2nd friend looked into the dead body's face and said, "yep that's definitely Joe," but then to be absolutely sure he turned the body over, pulled down the back of his pants and said, "oh no wait that's not Joe. Confused the policeman asked, "how is it that when you look into his face you're sure he is your friend, but when you look at his ass you're sure he is not?" The 1st friend said, "well you see Joe has 2 assholes." "Are you serious? the policeman asked. "Oh yes," he replied, "we've never actually seen them but when the 3 of us hang out together people point and say, hey there's Joe with those 2 assholes."
A blond haired girl, a brown haired girl, and a ginger haired girl were out walking when the came across some tracks The brown haired girl looked at them and said, "I think they are elephant tracks." Then the ginger haired girl looked at the tracks and said, "No way they are definitely duck tracks." Finally the blond haired girl bent down to examine the tracks when she got hit by the train.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
What’s the definition of “perfect pitch?” Throwing a viola into the dumpster without hitting the rim.
