Make jokes

Why do blondes make bad bank robbers?

Because they tie up the safe and blow the guards.

How do you make the world’s greatest Harlem Shake?

Throw a flashbang into a room full of epileptics.

How do you make Olaf hard? You tickle his snowballs.

Tried making 9/11 jokes, but none of it kept falling apart.

What’s the best thing about making out with dead girls?

They can’t say no.

I know how unicorns make babies. The dad puts his horn in the girl's butt hole.

Life is a bitch, and people make it worse.

This thing that I'm in ("am") is a forsaken curse (beta).

What makes a healthy normal man different to a disabled man?

"I'm still standing, yeah, yeah, yeah!" (from Elton John)

What sound does a nut make when it comes alive?

Christmas!

Do depressed people hate swimming?

They hate it because they are already drowning in their depression, but they love it because it might make all their dreams come true.

Old people all ways get in the way some times don't they all ways to sloow when they are in front of you and make silly exsgouses dont they it is some times beyond a joke ! Lol

Ex-Boyfriend: You have no ass, so we're through!

Me: Stop being a dickhead, dude!! It ain't gonna make your little sausage any bigger!

A good man deserves a queen who will pussy slide on his penis casually, frig him with her thighs like a prostitute, make him laugh like a homie, cook like his mama.

Hey guys! Ello here with an update!

I know I haven't been doing a lot of jokes lately, so I will make sure to do that, but I have something to say! I am going to Disneyland today!! So here is the plan. Today we are going to leave around 2 and go to Downtown Disney for dinner and check into our hotel and stuff like that. Then we are going to wake up bright and early tomorrow and go to Disneyland and stay 'til midnight, and then on Monday we are going to California Adventure! I am missing school on Monday! I'm so excited! And don't worry, I will make sure to tell you guys all about it when we get back. Love y'all!

Why are you making all these bad jokes about orphans? What did they ever do to you?

Why aren’t Make-A-Wish kids allowed to fly?

Because they rarely make it out of the terminal.

Director: Hi, we are making a huge cliffhanger in this movie.

Actor: Really? What do I do?

Director: You will play the part of the cliff. (holds up hanging rope)

I have a huge thought: if Satan punishes people who are bad, doesn't that make him good?

I’d make a joke about prostitutes and women sleeping with multiple men, but it would just be whore-ible.

How to make white ice cream red... blend a baby into it!