Love

Love jokes

Kenya

  • Dear Kenya, love of life,

    Thanks for commenting on my jokes, and thanks for being a nice person to me! Love, Jaden. You can tell by the emojis 🥰😍❤️💞!

    Love you a million times more!

    Guy

  • What do you call a guy with a bald head who loves to eat biscuits, raisins, and caster sugar?

    Gary Baldy (Garibaldi)!

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  • Rape

  • I always loved going to Bill Cosby's house; he always greeted me when I woke up with "Rapey-rapey, eggs and bakey."

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  • Dad

  • Daughter: Dad, why did Mom do best?

    Dad: Nothing, except pretend to love us and leave.

    Daughter: So she only loves my sister?

    Dad: Yep.

    Song

  • 1, 2, Freddy's coming for you.

    3, 4, better lock your door.

    5, 6, grab a crucifix.

    7, 8, stay up late.

    9, 10, never sleep again.

    I love this song, y'all! Like if you love it too! :)

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  • Dog

  • I think democracy is a scam. I love men and I love you. I love men and I love you. I love my dog. He won't sleep inside and I shitted my pants. I peed my pants. I smell bad. I took a shower and my dog was like, "Oh my god." I was like, "Oh." I was like, "Oh my god," and then I was like, "I shitted again" and he was like, "Bark bark," cause he's a dog. Thanks for listening.

    Smile

  • My mom loved taking pics of me when I was a child. Thanks to that, people really believe my fake smiles! :3

    Date

  • There is a man and a woman on a date.

    The woman asked what kind of things do you love?

    The table starts to lift up on the man's side and the man says sorry.

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  • Daughter

  • It was raining sadly all day. My wife, my two daughters, and me were stuck in the house when wife’s mom and dad just died.

    Wife: 😭😭😭I wish this never happened.

    Mia, our first daughter: Mommy, it’s ok. I love whenever I see you🥰🥰

    Abby, our second daughter: I love you all. Only if you guys die I won’t, but I love you when you're alive 😉😏

    Me, husband: What kind of nonsense was that? You love us when we’re alive, but you don’t love us when we’re dead🤥😥😓

    Everyone except Abby: Abby, this is serious. Mommy’s mother and father died. Mia says: Yes, your mom is sadly down right now, you made her more sad😡🤬. Dad says: *sniffs* Abby, I had made a discussion. I will take you to an orphanage. I am sorry 😣 when I am better and happy and I forgot what you said then we’ll get you back. Mom says:

    This was not a joke. I just did this for Love 💕

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  • Competition

  • Mr. Smith: Neona, tell us what you have for the biggest competition that we can do to keep our competitors out of the winning streak?

    Neona: Will thought we used more sales and more advertising.

    Mr. Smith: It's already a good idea. Now what about the business plan? We need it as recommendations to keep the business going. Tell me, what do you have in mind?

    Neona: It is better to always have a plan. I was thinking that we can get higher prices and always get great deals. The people will go nuts for a great deal!

    Mr. Smith: Perfect. Now let's take a 5 minute break.

    Mr. Smith: Ok, 5 minutes is up! Now Neona, I know you are an intern, but what are the best things we can do for the company?

    Neona: Hmm...let's see...will we can start with all the things people love! If this is going to work then we have have to......

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  • Job

  • Neona: Gwen! I got the job!!!!!!!!!

    Gwen: I knew it! I knew my prayer worked!

    Neona: He said that all my ideas are the best and that I start on Monday!

    Gwen: Man, don't you love Mr. Jaekson? He is the best person the company has ever had!

    Neona: Who is Mr. Jaekson?

    Gwen: Wait... Mr. Jaekson didn't interview you?

    Neona: No! Mr. Smith did. He said he was standing.

    Gwen: No, Mr. Smith, you are a fool who never lets you spread the word or do anything. I can also mention that he is a person who has sexual problems!

    Neona: Gwen, you are a liar!

    Gwen: No, I'm not. I'm telling the truth, Neona!

    Neona: Gwen, please be happy that I got the job without you lying that Mr. Smith sexual assaults women!!!

    Gwen: He does, you're not listening.

    Neona: I don't care, BITCH!!!!

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