bestfriend @3am: i love you me : love u too *wait whatttttttttttttttttttt*
idk if this is funny
I decided to take my mother-in-law out the other day, I love being a hitman
Why do ghosts love elevators, they lift their spirits!
Why did the orphan try to get hurt
Because than they would get surrounded with people who care about him
He looks around no one is there
I was walking till i saw a kid sitting on the street. I walked over there and said where are your parents? He cried even more. oh i just love talking to orphans.
Guys help- i need advice to confess to my crush. I'm being fr rn guys help
Q: why do orphans love playing tennis A: bc the ball comes back
What game do emo kids love the most Hang man
Every one likes orphans but there parents
i once called a depressed guy why he loves ropes so much, and he left HUNGing on the phone (im not englishs so i could've talked bad)
I bought a ceiling fan the other day.
It was a complete waste of money.
He just stands there applauding and saying
"Ooh, I love how smooth it is."
Hey girl, are you suicide? 'Cause I think of you everyday.
i love the way the earth rotates
it really makes my day
My boss said she would’ve loved to meet bill Cosby as a child. I don’t get why im getting arrested, I was just making sure he dream came true
Every body loves guns! Everytime I show them mine, they give me free stuff.
What's the difference between my girlfriend and my uncle? my girlfriend didn't go to jail for loving me.
Relationships are like fat people.
Most of them don’t work out.
roses are red, violets are blue, i have five fingers, and the middle one is for u.
I'd love it if you killed yourself, but Hitler killed himself and people still hate him...
What do Ellen DeGeneres and homeless people have in common?
They don’t cook because they love eating out
