Like jokes
An Indian has a seat between two Pakistani's on board an airplane.
It's quite obvious to each of the three men where they are from. The Indian asks, "Pardon me gentleman, you wouldn't mind me sitting between you, do you? This is my seat, after all."
The Pakistanis look at each other, and then look back at him. One of them smiles and says, "Not at all! After all, Pakistanis and Indians are brothers! Are we not?"
The Indian is delighted at how warm and friendly they are, and he takes his seat. Shortly the plane takes off and the three guys are just chilling until the Indian says, "You know it's going to be a long ride and I am getting thirsty. Brothers, can I get any of you like a drink?" Then one of them says, "Yes brother, I would like a Coke!"
The Indian slips off his shoes and walks barefoot to where the stewardess is at, and when the Indian is out of view, one of the Pakistanis spits into his shoe. The Indian comes back and gives him a Coke.
Then the other Pakistani says, "You know what brother? I would also like a Coke too!" The Indian happily obliges, and as soon as he is out of view, he also spits in his shoe before the Indian gives him a Coke.
Finally, the Indian slips on his shoes and suddenly realizes how wet they are. He shakes his head and says, "Brothers! Why must we do this to each other, spitting in each other's shoes and peeing in each other's Cokes?"
Why did the Indian man eat a cow?
Because he wanted to be fat like one.
One day, Johnny told his dad that a girl in his class liked him. He thought she was cute. She said, "Aw, you're like candy!" He didn't say anything. He said, "Why don't you think I am sweet like candy?" Little Johnny said, "Well, sometimes I get a toothache, and it hurts, so I stop eating it, like I stopped liking you."
Diabetic wives are like Cillit Bang. Squeeze them a bit and bang! The bed is gone.
My mom's name is Angel, and she is nothing like one!
Especially in bed...
Memes
I like my coffee like my men, long and black.
"Akeld" sounds like a 56-year-old man just picking on kids for no reason. I say, get a life!
Ah, son of a bitch, I got the truth stuck on my shoe?!?!
The truth: Breast feeding is like having long sex with your baby. God dammit, I hate the truth!
I hate this website. It sucks. Like if you agree!
Bell is so ugly, she acts like a boy.
Orphans are human, too! They just don't know who their parents are or where! I know four sisters named Mariah, Kariah, Lariah, and Iariah and they said they are orphans, too! And they are sad and they don't like your jokes!
Does anyone know how to add pictures? Like, I need to know.
Yo mama is so fat, she couldn't even fit through the rabbit hole at first because she ate like a damn pig last night when we had dinner.
Friend: Do you think she likes me?
Me: Yah.
Friend: Reallyπππ?
Me: Hell no.
Friend: π₯ππ«ππππππ You did not have to be so honest.
Your nana gay, just like you, and you're made of atoms, nerd.
If I had a face like yours, Iβd sue my parents!
My name is Caleb, and I like boo and eat it.
Five minutes later, she agreed to get with me, so we went and rocked the minivan like, "Giggity, Giggity, Giggity!"
What does a cow sound like when in a horror house?
Moo mooo moooooooo (screaming)!
Wade likes Luiz!
