Like jokes

Did you know you don't actually wash your hands?

They wash each other while you stand there looking at them like a creep.

If this gets 10 comments (I don't care about likes) I will write a four page essay and post it, and it's up to you guys what it's about.

Like this,

it will give you good luck. See for yourself!

I got a bowl of rice that you're formed like, an ice cube.

You know what I like most about people with Parkinson's... Their handshake!

You look like a double dipped chocolate chip cliff flipped glazed charcoal slim jim Mr. clog hunch frap, no feet, 9 arms, 17 stomachs. You stepdad beat you with a wiffle ball bat. NBA Youngboy was in your bathroom spitting on you and now you got herpes on your left side cheek.

Heaven is like university: no one gets in.

Your favorite artist must be Rihanna, the way your forehead shines bright like a diamond!

What's green and smells like joemama? Shit from a cock.

British emo people be like, "Oi, I'm upset."

My mom told me to go to bed, but then I grabbed a drink and went in their room to say goodnight, and they looked like Adam and Eve on steroids!

"Float like a cracker, sting like a beaner!"

How to harass? Say it out loud but slowly. Split that word into, and it sounds like "her ass."

Your hairline be looking like the Great Recession.

Your hairline be lookin' like my negative bank account balance -1,000,000.

Society is like chess, it's always whites vs blacks.

Why do orphans like families? Because they wish they had one.

A boy's hairline is always in the back of his head, and its shape is like a check mark.

It looks like Kevin Magnussen finally got pole position.

He has the bragging rights that he took over Russia now.

Bro, the Twin Towers are like my grandpa and his friends. One survived—my grandpa. The others have fallen—his friends.