Life jokes
Josh: Tell me something funny.
Mark: My life.
This is the song we all misunderstood: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2S0QhGGO1gQ
"He said, "One day, you'll leave this world behind, so live a life you will remember." My father told me when I was just a child, "These are the nights that never die." My father told me."
Whenever I think about it deeply, it makes me wanna cry :(
Unknown be like: "Wah wah, I'm too scared to talk to girls in real life, so I bully random tweens I find online to make me feel better... what a shame."
Fuck y'all, orphan lives matter!
What's an orphan's least favorite joke?
... YO MAMA SOO, Oh wait...
A surgeon loses his job as he botched a surgery.
boss: "We have to let you go."
surgeon: "I protest innocence."
boss: "How?"
surgeon: "I thought doing your job and saving people's lives were two different things."
boss: "Get out!"
Me: Help, I'm stuck in a trap.
Friend: What kind?
Me: It's called life. Yeah, I've been trying to get out of it for six years now, it just won't let me go.
Friend: That's not funny..
Me: Yeah? Nor is wanting to die, yet I'm still over here laughing every time I try to.
Friend: I'm calling your mom.
Me: She knows.
Friend: What's she doing to help, then?
Me: She's supposed to help?
Friend: Have you told your dad?
Me: I will when he comes back.
Friend: Where is he?
Me: I don't know, he's been gone for 15 years.
Friend: ....
Me: What?
Friend: Why?
Me: Why what?
Friend: Why would you joke like that?
Me: I was joking..
Friend: I know.
Me: Oh. I didn't know.
Friend:...
Me: Have a nice day, I'll see you tomorrow... Maybe...
Why didn't the kid cancer patients like his joke?
He said, "You'll understand when you get older!"
I could be red, I could be orange, I could be yellow, I could be green, I could be blue, I could be purple, but I would be dead.
What's the difference between a dad and an Emo?
They both don't last a while.
What is the difference between a suicidal person and you? You're not dead.
What's the difference between a prisoner and an orphan?
One is loved.
Me testing if there is fall damage in real life (falls off of a cliff, uses water bucket trick) dies.
Give a man a plane ticket, and he’ll fly for a day.
Push a man from a plane, and he’ll fly for the rest of his life.
"Like if u cry everytime."
How is sex like air?
It’s not a big deal unless you aren’t getting any.
I am not making a noose; I am making an unsubscribe button for life.
Has anyone alive ever died?
Is this our eternal life?
I am going to be a ghost for Halloween. I actually want to be a ghost every day, because at least I'd be dead.
Why did the emo person cross the road?
TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE Haha.