Life jokes
Drinking coffee when you're anxious is about as effective as using gasoline to put out a fire, but slurp slurp guess who's an anxious bitch who never learns.
If you think your life is bad, then people are discussing the gender of Mr. Potato Head.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples are actually picked.
Someone: "I WANNA BE THE SUN OF YOUR LIFE!"
Me: Then stay at 1,000,000 km of me.
Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh life?
Yo mama so stupid, she joined the Squid Game as a sea life lover because she thought it was a game of whoever catches the most octopuses wins.
Who needs April 1st if your whole life is already a lie?
Okay, the time has come... I am finally leaving this website, so yeah.
I'm going to enjoy my life, so yeah.
I'm going to leave now, so bye.
When you breathe.
There were four people in a helicopter: Trump, a first-grade kid, a schoolteacher, and the Chinese leader.
There were only three parachutes. The Chinese leader takes one and jumps. The schoolteacher says she has to teach, so she jumps. Trump and the first-grader are left. Trump says, "I've lived my life; you take the last one." So the kid puts on his backpack and jumps. Trump makes it out safe.
The reason why God and Jesus have eternal life and the power, aka (holy spirit) is to control us, take our free will, and our eternal life, which is our heaven. Our time!
Just to show up, in the nick of time for the second coming in full costume ready to judge us. Them spending a lifetime preparing their big speech, their excuse of them hiding this whole time.
Lol, Surprise!
Joke being on them.
As we all stand there and are there to judge them, doing what they said they were made for.
Taking our eternal life back from Satan and the Devil and sending them to their home they created themselves!
HELL!
P.S. With a little extra punishments!
What's worse than dedicating your life to build back the towers? Doing it and getting terrorized for it...
What is the difference between Betty White and Paul Walker?
Betty didn’t reach 100 before she died.
I've always been suicidal. Some might say, "Why haven't I actually done the act?" I'll just say, well, I hate myself too much so I thought I'd stay around for the punishment of staying alive.
People say dogs are like their owners. So true. My dog keeps on running into the street as if she doesn't care about her life.
I don't care about her life either hahahaha!! :)
Life is too short, just like me. Get roasted, short people!
There was a man in a wheelchair, and he got knocked out in front of a bus. He had a wheelie good life!
What is hell to you?
Jesus!!!!!
He is everywhere taking our time and energy and our lives for his entertainment.
But Judgment Day is his eternal hell!
And our Eternal Heaven!!
The penis has a sad life. His hair is always a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor is an asshole, his best friend is a pussy, and his owner beats him.
He also stands up for kids who can't defend themselves.
What's the similarity between your money and your life?
It just keeps going down.