Life

Life jokes

Orphan

Why did the orphan cross the road?

Because there was a dad on the other side.

Website

ATTENTION EVERYBODY: I am the owner of this website, and I will be deleting it in 5 hours. Thank you everybody who has participated in this website's life. Goodbye!

People

I hate people that hate life.

Me at the same time: Is cutting self at night.

*hides scars* *acts like I'm fine* hehe

Tree

What happens when a depressed kid try’s to high-five a tree?

The tree leaves them hanging.

Orphan

Why did the orphan cross the road?

He thought he saw his parents.

Oasis, am I right?

Immortal

Let's say I was immortal. No matter what I did, I would be alive. But, the catch is I’m the least flexible and least strong person in the world.

Now, I get my head chopped off. What would I do? I would roll over to my headless body and figure out what it's like to suck my own dick.

Routine

I have a daily routine where I take a crap every morning at 6 AM, but wake up at 7 AM. And it's not even a joke.

Kid

What is common with dark humor and unvaccinated kids?

Neither do ever grow old.

Mother

Every time you feel lucky to have your mother in your life, what should you tell her?

I really hit the mother lode with you!

Orphan

Did you hear about the orphan who ran away from home?

Wait a minute! What am I talking about?

Death

What do your teacher and your friend have in common?

They will both die eventually.

Suicide

People always often say to someone who are thinking about suicide that's the easy way out. Don't give up! All I say is I'm not giving up, just I'm giving in, and does it really seem like it's the easiest way out? I don't think so, it's probably the hardest if you ask me, or I would have done it already, but someone's got to do it.