Routine jokes

Amber Heard's Morning Routine

Wake Up. Eat Breakfast. Take a Shit. Get Out of Bed.

Spongebob and Jacko have one thing in common.

They both routinely place meat in small buns.

My fish can break dance. Only for 20 seconds and only once.

What is the second hardest thing in the morning?

Getting up.

My day started out great until I woke up.

What is the toughest thing about living a vegan life?

Getting up at 5am to milk the almonds.

I'm so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes closed.

Go on the quintillionaire morning routine now!

1. Wake up. 2. Take a shit. 3. Eat. 4. Get out of bed. 5. Have breakfast.

So a guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender says tell me a joke. So the guy says: so a guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender says tell me a joke. So the guy says: so a guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender says tell me a joke. So the guy says: so a guy walks into a bar and he asks the bartender for a drink. So he gives the guy a drink. So he gives the guy a drink. So he gives the guy a drink.

I went for my routine check up last week, and everything was going great until the doctor stuck her finger up my butt. Should I look for a new dentist?

You're the type of person to wash your hands after a shower.

Millions of people are doing the exact same thing as you are right now.

You know if you poo on the toilet at 11:59 PM...

Then at 12:01 AM, it's just the same shit, different day...

Man: Hi, Doc, I have a problem. I take a shit at 6:00 AM every morning.

Doc: What's wrong with that?

Man: I don't wake up until 8:00 AM.

What should orphans do when their parents aren’t there? The usual.

I have a daily routine where I take a crap every morning at 6 AM, but wake up at 7 AM. And it's not even a joke.

Me and my friend's life story on a daily basis.

Why do people eat cereal for breakfast?

Because why not.

The first ever joke:

https://worstjokesever.com/jokes/52b8feb0514efb2cbf8ca375/what-is-the-second-hardest-thing-in-the-morning?

What goes in hard and comes out soft? A toothbrush.