Legs jokes

You’re so short, you can swing your legs when you sit on a stool.

What did the plane that crashed on the ground say? Let me crash between those legs, girl!

Sorry, cringy joke.

One time I broke a leg and I was using a wheelchair.

My parents thought I was a disappointment and put me up on eBay, the Ohioan Black Market, and the nearest adoption center.

Two lions plan their escape from the circus. The night they get out of their cages, they see a lone clown stumbling back from town, drunk, not a soul in sight. Since they are going on the run, they decide to catch one last meal before they hit the road.

As one lion gets a bite of leg, the second takes a piece of shoulder.

Then one stops and asks his companion:

"Does this taste funny to you?"

One time an ant was collecting food. Suddenly, a wind pushed the ant into the river. The ant said, "Help! Help!" and a pigeon heard it. Then, he grabbed a leaf and threw it in the river. The ant climbed on it, and then the pigeon and the ant became best friends. But one time, a hunter came to kill the pigeon. When the ant saw him, she bit his leg and the pigeon flew away from the arrow, and that's how friends are, everybody.

What do you call it when a town on the south coast of England sprouts legs and starts walking around the country?

A walkie-Torquay.

Why did the wheels not move on his wheelchair?

Because he had no legs.

Q: Where does a one-legged waitress work?

A: IHOP.

What do an acting role and playing sports have in common?

If you break a leg, you get cast.

What's the name for a short legged tramp?

A low-down bum.

What has 4 legs and 1 arm?

A pitbull in a children's play area.

A child was walking through the forest when a wolf jumped in front of him. The child saw that the wolf had no leg. He then became a terrorist and caused 9/11.

What has two legs, two arms, one dead and covered in red?

My ex-wife.

When you see a woman with a leg chain, what usually comes to your mind?

Why can't a girl with no legs play soccer? Because she's a girl.

Yo mama so "PHAT," she has big boobs and nice legs!

What time is it when you get home?

Have you heard the word of the day? It’s "legs".

Now, let’s go back to my place and I can spread them.

I do not understand why people aren't scared of spiders. I mean, like they have 87447924872320984623879480327678987388025873289576348097923408370983728 legs and 23864867759578590893839420387424763478923748394783294327428748243264278 eyes.

I saw a spider in my room. YOU THINK I'M GONNA SLEEP IN THERE?????????

Nope. I'm moving to Japan.

KONNICHIWA

What do you call a person with one arm, one leg, one eye, and one ear?

ONESY.

“Hey dad, how do you kill a star?” - Give them drugs.