What do you call a Chinese man with one leg? Tie won shu

A wife decided to leave for a vacation, leaving her husband in supervision of her mother and her cat. After a few days, she called her husband and asked, “How is everything going?” He responded with, “The cat is dead.” She cried out and said, “Why couldn’t you’ve broken the new slowly? You could have said the cat is playing on the roof or on the first day, and the next say it broke its leg, then the next that the poor things dead! Anyways, how’s my mom?” “She’s playing on the roof.”

What do you call a dog with no legs? – Doesn’t matter what you call him, he’s not coming.

What Do You Say To A One Legged Hitch Hiker

Hop In

Kid:what is between moms legs? Dad:paridise. Kid whats between you legs? Dad:the key to paridise. Kid:well uou better change the lock the neighbor has the key to.

When your sad don’t feel down about yourself break someone’s leg and laugh.

I got a handjob of a blind woman the other day she said its the biggest thing i ever had in my hand i said no love your just pulling my leg

The teacher asked her student to say the alphabet , The student recited the alphabet abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwxyz, Where’s the p, He looked down to the floor and said : it’s running down my legs

Where do you find a dog with no legs?

Where you left it.

Where does a girl with one leg work? IHOP.

Why does sumo wrestlers shave their legs?

Because they don’t want to be mistaken as feminists

according to all known laws of aviation, a bee should not be able to fly, it wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. but of course, bees fly anyway because bees don’t care about what humans think is impossible, Yellow, Black. Yellow, Black

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef. What do you call a cow with 3 legs? Lean beef. What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Your mom.

A man woke up from a serious surgery. He screamed, “Doctor! Doctor! I can’t feel my legs!”. And the doctor replied, “I know. I amputated you arms.”

There’s a man in Florida with no arms or legs who is armed and on the run

What do you call a dog with no legs ?

It doesn’t matter he isn’t coming to you.

Why is sex like math? You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there’s no multiplying.

Boys: “Hey, can billy come out and play baseball?” Mom: “That’s not funny, you know billy doesn’t have any arms and legs” Boys: “I know, we need a third base”

i hear skeletons like to play the saxaBONE, though i think the tromBONE would be better, but tibia honest, both can be HUMERUS, wouldnt wanna hurt your funny bone, but i think your starting to get BONELY so ill stop pulling your leg. Now get out before i give you a bad time.

This boy was in school one day when he became desparate to go to the bathroom. So he asked the teacher, “May I use the bathroom?”

The teacher replied, “No, not unless you say your alphabet.”

So the boy said “a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z.”

When he finished, the teacher asked him, “Where’s the p?”

The boy replied, “Half way down my leg…”