A woman asked Stephen Hawking to dance, and he replied, "I'm not much good, I have two left feet."
"Then how about Karaoke?"
To which he replied, "I have two left throats."
No matter how much I cry, the white people still left me hanging.
Some jokes are best left not harassed by those who are offended by them.
For I have everyone's IP address.
You only put your user name under Daddyboy_01 because your dad left you, hahahah!
The mom and dad left the child because they were famous and rich, like rich monkeys.
I left my Avatar at home today.
If your hairline was a river, it would meander left, right, and backwards.
Once at school, a teacher thought I was Russian. Why do you think that? I said. The teacher replied, because you're reading from Right to Left.
My son wore his new "Go Vegan" Hoodie for the first time today, and already he's been verbally abused as well as being punched, kicked, & spat on!!!!
And he's not even left the house yet!!!
What did the bison say to his son when he left the ranch? Bi-son.
a man comes to a bar and has a drink then his bully came to him and Stoll his drink then the bully asked "what wrong" the man said that "I trying to kill myself I try getting hit by a Tran but the train went on the different track then I try to jump of a brig but I fell on a bot full of pillows then I try to Posen myself " then the bully say "then what " then man replied you just dunked it "then the man left.
DDLC be like: "You kinda left her (Sayori) hanging."
And Yuri TOOK A SEAT...
On the floor.
And died.
The end.
Two wrongs don't make a right, but three lefts make a right.
Stephen Hawking is the fastest footballer ever--he could just charge up the Left Wing!
Two to the one from the one to the three, I like good pussy and I like good trees, Smoke so much weed you wouldn't believe, And I get more ass than a toilet seat.
Three to the one from the one to the three, I met a bad bitch last night in the D, Let me tell you how I made her leave with me, Conversation and Hennessey.
I've been to the motherfuckin' mountain top, Heard motherfuckers talk, seen and dropped, If I ain't got a weapon I'ma pick up a rock, And when I bust yo ass I'ma continue to rock.
Getcha ass of the wall with your two left feet, It's real easy just follow the beat, Don't let that fine girl pass you by, Look real close 'cause strobe lights blind.
What did the left butt cheek say to the right?
"Trump 2020."
In a bowl of golden delight, I savored each bite so bright, The potato salad, oh so fine, Left me feeling oh so divine.
The diced potatoes, oh so neat, In a dressing so cool and sweet, With onions and eggs, a treat, My taste buds did dance and greet.
The mayonnaise, a creamy dream, With mustard's zesty scheme, Together they did blend so well, My senses did take a spell.
The herbs, a fragrant delight, Added flavor with their might, Parsley and dill, a perfect pair, In this salad beyond compare.
So here's to the potato salad, A culinary work of art, That left me full and satisfied, And in my heart, a special part.
"Guess what my wife left in the freezer?"
"Her miscarriage."
A calendar asked the doctor how many time he's got left. The doctor replied: "'Til December."
Did you hear about the mad who got his whole left side cut off? He's all right now.
