Law jokes

Orphans can be a robber if they want because their parents won't be disappointed.

If you're ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

Unbelievable! When doctors touch my body, it’s alright, but if I do the same to some lady, apparently it’s "harassment!"

One day, I was walking through a park when I realized it was crowded.

To this day, I still don't know who let the children out of my basement.

It’s sad how my friend was struck from the medical register for sleeping with a patient.

He was a great vet.

Yo yo Zac, have you Amber HEARD about the Johnny Depp case? ARRRRRRRRRRR!

Bye, I'm Paul Badman. Did you know that you don't have rights? The Articles of Confederation say you don't, and so do I. I believe that until proven innocent, every woman, man, and adult in this country is guilty. And that's why I don't fight for you, Santa Fe!

Why do orphans become criminals?

To feel what it is like to be wanted.

What's a convict's favorite song?

"I want to break free."

You have been accused of stealing toilet rolls. How do you plead?

Guilty or not guilty?

What does a kite and a criminal have in common?

They both get high.

Why did the robber take a shower before his robbery?

So he could make a clean getaway!

I got banned from the library because I put the woman's rights book in the fiction section.

Someone complimented me on my driving last week. They left a note saying, "Parking Fine!"

KK or Liv?

Why can't antelopes get married?

Because they can't elope.

What did the ferret say after his family was questioned by police?

It's none of your business!

"Bippity Boppity Boop! Bill Cosby's coming for you!"

A man walks into a bar. The corrections officer says, "Usually we open the cell before you go in, now stop bleeding on my floor!"

What do a 14-year-old pregnant girl and the child inside her have in common?

Both are thinking, “Oh no! My mom’s gonna kill me!”