Law jokes
How does the cop respond to being called racist?
He said, "How can I be racist? My wife's eyes [are] black."
My father told me to always carry a women's bag, but I don't know why he called the cops on me when I helped Mom's bag when we went parachuting. :(
Why don't rappers ever become bankers?
Because they always break the BARS!
I found Jeffrey Epstein’s diary the other day.
The last entry was about 12 years old.
Kelly Clarkson and Ian Watkins of the Lostprophets both walk into a bar. The bartender asked, "Hitting on some 2-year-olds today?" It may have been an innocuous question, if it weren't for the fact that the bartender is Chris Hansen.
What is a necrophiliac's safe word?
"I'm alive!"
Where did Jeffrey Epstein go to college?
Bring them young.
What is the difference between Bill Cosby and a rap artist?
The word "art."
Why did the DJ go to jail?
Because he dropped the bass too hard!
Why did the rapper go to school?
To improve his rap sheet!
"Officer, I drop kicked that child in self-defense." -Techno
I was walking down the street and I punched a white guy and then I was arrested for assault.
The next day after I got out, I punched a black guy and I was arrested for impersonating a police officer.
Don’t be racist. Racism is a crime, and crime is for black people.
My brother is ugly. One time he stuck his head out the window. The police arrested for mooning.
People who wannabe rich and famous rappers should always look at Tekashi 6ix9ine, and learn what not to do.
Leo must be a parking ticket... not because of the “fine” thing, nah, it’s because she’s OVERSTAYED her WELCOME.
Why are Palestinian boys so eager to grow a beard?
So they can use their mum's ID to get in the club.
A kid asks Trump:
Kid: "Where are the confidential files?"
Trump: "There they are, bud!"
Who needs dating apps when you have family reunions?
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a good body these days?
I think Jeffrey Dahmer had the right idea, just put it in the freezer.