So, there was this cop on the top bunk of a bunk bed. Another cop walks in and sits on the bottom bunk and the cop on the top bunk bed said, "You're under a-rest."©
Crimes in 2018- assault, murder. Crimes in 2020- coughing in public.
A lady asked if I heard about the mass shooting in Ohio. I said yes my friend died there. She said I’m so sorry. I said yeah I tried telling him the police had good aim. Worse than that he just found out his sister was cheating on him.
What does a cop say when they shoot ginger? Orange is the new black
I recently got pulled over by the cops and started spazzing out because of the police lights
He arrested me for impersonating Gorge Floyd. *I have seizures*
The best part about Poland 🇵🇱 is the the police lights are different
What do you say when you wake up to the police trying to arrest you? “Cmon, did ya really think I’d resist a-rest?”
Osama Bin Laden, Josef Stalin and Hitler are robbing a bank, who do the cops shoot first?
A black guy
Police officers hope you’re a criminal. Doctors hope you get sick. Mechanics hope you get car troubles. But only thieves wish you prosperity. Weird?
Did you hear what happened to Lorainna Bobbit? She was in an accident on the Garden State Parkway. She told the State Police Officer, That some dick cut her off.
Officer don’t arrest me she said she was 5 in dog years
Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the police... who? It's the police, let me in so I can get some donuts!
being a police officer in Nunavut must be so fun. they get to play Cut the rope on the job all the time!
A Pedo is driving down a highway really slowly and gets stopped by the police. The officer asks why he was driving so slowly the man answers I dont wake up the kids.
The police department made a new machine that will teleport you back to prison if you commit a crime. The police release 4 criminals. I hacker, a rapist, a serial killer and a drug lord. The hacker tries to hack a bank. The hacker gets teleported back to prison. The drug lord tries to cook meth. The drug lord gets teleported back to prison. Now the serial decides that she want’s to change, but when she see a knife she just can’t help it. He bends down to pick up the knife and the rapist get teleported back to prison
What is a bullet and a police officer have in common... when a bullet kills someone it gets fired
A woman ran into a police station screeming "help i have bin graped" the policeman said "do you mean raped" the woman said "no the was a bunch of then".
A police officer pulls a man over. "Hands in the air!" The man said, "okay."
These jokes are darker than the list of victims dead from cops.
One day there was a guy who robbed a bank. A customer at the bank while it happened got the police. Who was that? The police said...... It’s a wood hulem
