Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one – and let the other one off
A limbless criminal has just been identified. Police says the suspect is armed and on the run.
I am an actual police officer (Not gonna mention with which department in case they actually check this site) and tbh I find these jokes funny as fuck, carry on boys
A cement mixer has collided with a prison van. Motorists are asked to look out for 16 hardened criminals.
What did the racist serial killer say to the cop?
“Wait, you’re getting paid?”
Things you never want to do in jail - never piss off an inmate - don’t start fights with the cops - don’t drop the soap - don’t run away from the cops
Two priests walk into a store and cops come up to them and say they’re looking for a child molester and the priests both say I’ll do it
Someone stole my grass today, I went to the police and they said: "What's wrong?" I said "How could you tell something was wrong?" they replied "you were looking forlorn"
what does the policeman say to the Jumper?
"hey!Pullover"
"You are under arrest for illegally downloading the entire Wikipedia."
"Wait! I can explain everything."
I hate double standards if you burn a body at a crematorium you're doing a good job if you burn a body t home you're destroying evidence.
A lady runs into a police station and yells "help, help". I've been graped then a police officer says "Do you mean raped". The girl then replies "No there was a bunch of em".
What was the name of Russia's first female traffic cop?
Ivana Pulyova
what did the woman do when the armed police officer raped her?
freeze
what do you call an autistic police officer? special forces
somebody called the cops for a school shooting, what a snitch
What do orphans and police not have in common
The police can actually go home
What's the difference between a Pig and a Police officer.
The Pig smells better
Police: Where do u live Me: With my parents Police: Where your parents live Me: With me Police: Where do you all live Me: Together Police: where is your house Me: Next to my neighbor Police: Where is your neighbor’s house Me: If I tell you, you won't believe me Police: Tell me Me: Next to my house
My uncle is a computer genius! The police even called him a pdf file!!
