Last jokes

The last thing I said to my dog was,

"Play dead."

Gen Z is most likely going to be the last generation who felt the pain of getting up early to catch their favorite show.

Jo Mama is so fat, I left her printing last year, and she is still printing!

Everything is now so expensive in Africa that witches don’t serve food in dreams again. Am I lying? Okay, when last did you eat in your dreams?

I remember last year all these bitches called me lame so I stopped the simping and pretended I was gay, now I think they're all fucking with me.

I'm an LGBTQ imposter got cut last year know I've made the roster and you may think I'm a monster. I'm just just tryna see some titties.

My friend fell on the Nile river and Egypt last week.

He swears by it, but he’s in denial.

Why do black people have nightmares? Because the last person who had a dream got shot.

Did you hear? There is a new toy for boys ages 2-10. It's called Jackson. A tiny white doll, with black Jackson. Get it while supplies last.

Mum finds out child cheats in math test.

Mom says, "There is no cheating in this house."

Child: "Then why did you cheat with my math teacher last night?"

I shouted at a kid. I told him to get his parents.

It was the last time I worked at an orphanage, 🤣.

Imagine if a disabled person's last name was Runner or Walker! 😬😂

Q. What's the best part of living in Alabama?

A. Not having to change your last name when you get married.

Hillary Clinton lost last time to the first African American president, Barack Obama. Why will she lose this one to Donald Trump?

Because orange is the new black.

I found Jeffrey Epstein’s diary the other day.

The last entry was about 12 years old.

If I could make someone tell me their last words, they'd say, "Make me."

What did the orphan say to his dad last?

Please get non-fat milk!

Child: Hello, I can’t find my dad.

Stranger: Oh, well when and where did you last see him?

Child: Oh, I remember, 5 years ago he went to get some milk here.

I come in from work to see my wife dead on the sofa. As I unzip for one last ride, she says, "BOO!" What kind of a dick fuck does that!

I still remember my dad's last words: "Don't worry son, Allah will be pleased."

A man is on his death sentence, and he gets to choose his last meal.

He asks his guard for a McDonald's Ice Cream, and lives a very long life. They never found a working machine.