Language

Language Jokes

I was always told as a kid that I have to pick between being a programmer and an English teacher.

They said: you can't be a "pro-grammer nazi."

I asked a Chinese girl her number, she said "Sex, sex, sex, free sex tonight." I said, "Wow!"

Her friend corrected her by saying, "She means: 666-3629."

Someone at school judged my grammar.

I judged theirs by the terms "school" and "rifle range" being mixed up the next day.

I was sitting with my little brother when he was about four-ish. He was starting to really like to identify objects for some reason, so he was showing me his toys. He grabbed his toy Mator truck and then pointed to the wheels, saying, “These are wheels.” I said, “Good job, yes they are.” Then he pointed to the bumper and said, “This is a bumper.” Again, I congratulated him. Then, he grabbed the toy’s wire with the hook at the end and said, “And this is a hooker.” I died laughing.

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