Language jokes

Why did all the numbers laugh at 22? Because it had "tu tu's."

Sugar Honey Ice Tea.

I FORGOT MY JOKE!

When someone asks you for a beef (fight), just say you're a vegetarian.

Thanks for explaining the word "many" to me. It means a lot.

"Déjà moo": The feeling that you've heard this bull before.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Fuck. Fuck who? What, are you kidding me? I just wanted to tell you a joke!

My friend said to me, "How do you spell Tom?" and I said, "T-O-M-M." He said, "That's not how you spell 'it's Tom.' You have to take out one 'M'."

So I said, "But which one?"

I'll stop with the horrible puns if you can say a good joke.

"Dick dick dick, fuck dick nugget shit."

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Owl say.

Owl say who?

Yes, they do.

Spell "IOUT", no space.

I told you ten puns to make you laugh, and I do not pun in-ten-did.

What do you call a PEIS?

Your AMAMA.

Say:

"Eye"

Spell:

"Map"

Say:

"Ness"

Now say it fast!

I went to China and said, "I have a big cock," so they thought I said they look like a cock. Then I realized I said it in English.

Say, "Crack my fingers."

Now say that backwards...

What did the fish say when it hit the wall? Dam.

What did the other fish say to that fish when he hit the wall? Dumb Bass.

What's the difference between the microphone and Bambi?

One is a Welsh idea, the other's a well shy deer.

A friend of mine tried to annoy me with bird puns, but I soon realized that toucan play at that game.