Know jokes
Guy with no arms: Even if I don’t have arms, I can do everything you can do.
🎵if you’re happy and you know it clap your hands🎵
What is your name? What am I pointing at? 👃🏽 And what am I holding? Hahaha!!!!! Knows nothing.
Man, I didn't know they put Humpty Dumpty back together!
Friend: Hi.
Me: Do you know how lost their dad is?
Friend: Me?
Me: Damn, no, not you.
Friend: Then who?
Me: The orphan kid.
I guess we're the same.
My bad, but you stink so bad you passed by a trashcan and it yelled, "Wow! I didn't know I had family!"
Memes
Honestly
Stacy: Honey, I'm kinda new to texting, what does lol mean?
Justin: I'm not sure, "lots of love," I guess.
Margaret: Stacy, are you there? I don't know if you heard, but Amber and her three kids were killed in a car crash this morning. I'm in total shock!
Stacy: lol
You know what I told my little brother plane?
You want to get her pregnant before marriage to know if she's fertile, so why not marry a single mother that already has proof?
When does a dyslexic person know when they've spelt their address wrong?
When it fails to turn up.
What do you call a red potato?
A tomato. 🍅
(I know it's cringe!)
Blame Austria for creating Hitler, who we know today. He failed art school.
Did you know your dad was a magician? He disappeared the second he saw your ugly ass face!
Your hairline is so far back, your barber didn't know where to start.
Guys, should I do it? You know what I mean.
How do you know if a rapper is lying?
His rhymes don't add up.
I just had sex...
I think I nailed it!
(Shit joke, I know.)
I went to a gun shop yesterday. Everything was half off. I didn't know that back to school sales have begun.
I'd make a joke about pizza, but it's too cheesy. I know y'all have too thick of a crust to get it!
Is it a bird? Is it a plane?
I don't know, but it's coming for the towers.
Did Delaware wear a New Jersey? Idaho, Alaska?
What it actually means: Did Delaware wear a New Jersey? I don’t know. I’ll ask her.
P.S. My dad is a history teacher and he told me to put this in here.