Kill jokes
Person: You can't kill an orphan!
Me: What are they going to do, go tell their parents?
What would you do if you were killed?
My Grandpa killed 30 Air Force pilots in WW2. He was a very bad mechanic.
Want to know something? Jason and Michael Myers had to watch their family while they have to live forever. That's why they kill; they're trying to make people experience what they did.
I tried to fight a razor. It cut me so deep I thought I would die.
Turns out he didn't kill me. I was never happy, but that shit made me angry.
Memes
Why didnât the train kill nine families of four?
Because he had no loco-MOTIVE. AHAHAH
Why did the pencil want to kill himself?
He had no point in life.
What'd the farmer say when a coyote killed and ate his rooster?
"No, you ate my cock!"
If you are friendly on a game, should I will kill you in the game? You should say, "Will, if you did kill me, I will tell my more friendly to ban you from the game." The friendly should [ask], "What you got?" Friendly on the game [replies], "Jack, you are not my friendly, the all friendly you be ban, if you don't get it, will have fun." If you don't like the text, I am come for you. Ok, now like it, the end.
When Hitler killed himself, he shot himself twice. The first one was Operation Barbarossa, and the second one was his death.
"I want to kill my family."
-realizes-
Why do you like cream instead of bugs?
Because bugs can kill you.
Alright class, the person who answers my next question gets to go home.
Then a guy throws a pencil. The teacher asks, "Who threw that pencil?" "I did, I get to go home."
What's the best way to tell your friend you hate them? Option 1: Kill them. Option 2: Walk away. Option 3: Kill each other.
Me: Why can't I just kms and leave them the pain?
Global warming will kill every single person on this planet.
It's a good thing I'm married.
Why did McDonaldâs kill somebody because they stole the 12-piece nuggets that will never be seen because of them!
One day, a class of children were killed in a bus accident, but only some survived. One was praying that he would survive, and the other said, "First time?"
Kill yourself in anyway. I'm doing it the HIGHway.
I will unplug your life support to kill my mum and then give her blood so she can bleed more.
Foxy is red,
Bonnie is blue,
And Golden Freddy will kill you.