Kid jokes
Normal Kids: Today is a lovely day.
Emo kids: Here lies Chris, he shot himself!
Why did the kid throw the clock out the window? He wanted to see time fly.
Why did the emo kid not cross the road?
He was waiting for a car.
What's the quiet kid's favorite school lunch? Mac-10 and cheese.
Why are Black women dating white men?
So their kids don’t have to worry about not meeting their father.
that one short kid who thinks he is a superhero
Dad: I get to touch animals every day at the zoo.
Kid: Why?
Dad: I clean up animal s*** at the zoo.
I gave the blind kid a gun and called it a hair dryer.
If a homeschooled kid shoots his parents, does that count as a school shooting?
Teacher: "I was an orphan when I was a kid."
Students: "oof"
Teacher: "Is anyone missing?"
Students: "Yeah, your parents."
Once, there was a Minecraft child molester on the Minecraft Facebook. He asks a kid his age. The kid blocks him.
My kids told me to have a good day, so I left them to their own devices and hoped for the best.
Americans live in the U.S.A. The quiet kids live in the U.Z.I.
What do you call a disabled kid who is blind?
A grape chilli bean.
What's the difference between a seal and a special kid?
They both go: "Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh!"
It's funny how teachers are supposed to educate new lives, but only teach certain kids how much they want to commit suicide and how many ways there are.
What is the difference between a tree and a school?
A school is for kids, and a tree is for birds.
You're so ugly you make the blind kids cry 😭😭
So there's an orphan in a hospital, and the doctor walks up and says, "Sorry, kid, but this is a family hospital."
What do you call a kid with Down syndrome who plays basketball?
Dribble.
What do you call a kid in a hot tub?
Vegetable soup.