Kid jokes
What did the make-a-wish kid say when the Avengers turn up without Tony Stark?
"We are in the endgame now!"
Kidnapper: Hey kid, your parents told me to pick you up.
Kid: Sir, this is an orphanage.
Kidnapper: ...
You really can't call Stalin bad, just think about the kids that depression.
The African kids' theme song is "Staying Alive."
Why can't orphans really play baseball?
Because when they do, all the other kids tell that joke that everyone has heard more than 50 times.
When the quiet kid finally crashes out
Why did the kid cross the playground? To get to the other slide!
Two gay kids made their version of the Jack and Jill nursery rhyme.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pair of lattes.
What do you call a kid laying down in the classroom? Kill confirmed.
What do you call three kids laying down in the classroom? Kill streak.
Bro, I’m so pissed. There is always that one kid in the class who the teacher helps. I hate that guy in the wheelchair.
"Thank God there are no of these ahahha ya thank God to pranks."
"Oh I forgot a dance 🕺 😅 joke is good ok for kids."
Yo, so poor that you wash your paper plates and cutlery in a kids' dishwasher.
Oh, Lois, that was more scary than Michael Jackson without pants in front of a kid!
I saw some kid following me, so I told him to go back to his family.
Orphan: "What family?"
I was telling the emo kid emo jokes, and I couldn’t read them because I was laughing too hard. I almost cut the emo kid. He wasn’t laughing at the jokes.
Q: What did the kid say as he tossed a chair to his neighbor's house?
A: You're the chairman of the board!
What do you call a kid in a wheelchair?
TIMMAHHHH!
What do you call a bunch of autistic kids in a box?
A toolbox.
I saw a kid on the curb while I was on a walk, and he was in baggy clothes, and I said, "Are you an orphan?" He said, "Yeah." And the orphan said, "What gave me away?" I said, "Ur parents."
My school is on fire today, and I pushed a kid in a wheelchair down the stairs and shouted, "Hot Wheels!"
Me: "You wanna see my dad?"
Some kid: "Yeah?"
Me: "Close your eyes and he will appear."
Some kid: "He ain't appearing."
Me: "Sorry I thought he would appear for you. He won't appear for me."
*The kid laughs*
Moral: Not everything is supposed to be funny text if you notice what was really going on. 🙃