Kid

Kid jokes

Nun

Three nuns went up to Mother Teresa and said, "Mother Teresa, we would not like to be nuns anymore." Mother Teresa said, "Okay, but first you have to do something unholy." So they leave and come back three days later. The first one says, "Mother Teresa, I did something unholy. I took a little kid's bike." Mother Teresa says, "Okay, drink from the holy water and you are free to go." The second nun walks up, upset, "I did something worse than her. I slept with a married man." The last nun walks up and says, "I did something worse than all of them." Mother Teresa says, "Oh god, oh gosh, what is it?" And the third nun says, "I peed in the holy water."

College

College is the opposite of kidnapping. They demand $100,000 from you, or they'll send your kid back.

Ball

Once I threw the ball at a wheelchair kid. Now we are playing Rocket League! :D

Baseball

Orphans and Chinese people can’t play baseball. The orphans can’t find home, and the Chinese kid will eat the bat.

Tit

Pussies and tits have one thing in common: they're both made for kids, but men end up licking or suckling them.

Emo

Yesterday I got detention because I said to the emo kid, "Come hang with us."

Skill

What did Osama Bin Laden's kids not inherit after his death?

His hide-and-seek skills.

Tea

Why do emo kids drink only herbal tea? Because proper tea is theft.

Name

Emo chick: "I wish I could feel dead inside!"

The kid named Dead: "😄😄😄"

Emo

What did the emo say to the popular kid?

"Go fuck yourself for thinking all emos cut because they don't... y'know, for a matter of fact, fuck all you guys..."

Orphanage

Bully: How’s your girlfriend?

Kid: I don’t have one. How are your parents?

Bully: *cries*

Kid: *Walks out of the orphanage*

School

Why did the kid bring a ladder to school?

Because he wanted to go to high school.

Pilot

People joking about 9/11.

Random kid: "You shouldn’t joke about that! I lost my dad on 9/11."

Oh.

"Yeah, he was the greatest pilot ever!"

Fart

TELL ME YOU'VE DONE THIS WITHOUT TELLING ME YOU'VE DONE THIS.!!! So, we all know when y'all were in school, y'all would fart, but y'all would try to make it silent, but for me, that one day I farted loud, and everyone could hear. Everyone got to blame the annoying kid.