Kid jokes
What makes a depressed kid happy? ..... A bridge.
Teacher: "I'm sorry, but you got a 74 on the test."
Quiet Kid: "I'll show you my own 74."
Classroom: *visible panic*
When the autistic kid brings a gun to school and thinks it’s a dart gun.
So, this kid told me what high school he was going to and asked me if I thought he would make it in.
I said, "No, they don't have double doors."
Why do blind kids like plane crashes?
Because you can’t dislike what you have never seen.
When the depressed kid runs out of eyeliner, so he says "fruit ninja" with his wrists.
What do Kurt Cobain and an emo kid have in common?
They both smell like "Teen Spirit."
I went to the principal's office because I gave a deaf kid ear pods for his birthday.
What did the momma grape say to the pappa grape?
"Raisin' our kids is usually pretty fun, but sometimes they get sunburn and I have to take them to the doctor for dry skin."
Kid to daddy: "Why do they call it Uranus?"
Daddy to kid: "Cause, son, it's Uranus."
*in the hospital*
Paralyzed kid: I'm out!
*walks out the room*
Blind kid: You can walk?!
Mute kid: You can see?!
Deaf kid: You can talk?!
Doctor: Wut the f**k?
The time I saw you and you asked me to be your friend.
Me: "Yeah... no. You're too ugly. Even your parents never loved you."
Kid: 😭
Q: What is Michael Jackson's favourite vegetable?
A: The special ed. kid down the street.
Ever wondered why Chinese kids don’t believe in Santa?
They made the toys.
Little Johnny was getting beaten up by two kids, so I came and helped.
He won’t stand against the three of us!
Why are Black women dating white men?
So their kids don’t have to worry about not meeting their father.
Kids are cute, not even joking. Wanking is easy around them.
When the school shooter kills the teacher and the autistic kid declares communism
What is the difference between an orphan and a deaf kid?
They can't hear or speak to their parents that never came back.
I told my friend that we should dress up as P. Diddy and Drake for Halloween and ask parents if their kid wants to come over for a sleepover.