Kid jokes
I tried kidnapping a kid today and told him I was his dad's friend and I would take him home. He just curled up into a ball and started crying. Kidnapping must be easy.
What does an orphan say after a kid makes a "yo mama" joke?
"I don’t have a mama."
Why do emo kids not jump?
They're still in the sky.
A man saw a kid on the road, and the man asked: "Where are your parents?" The boy: "..." The man left the adoption center.
I saw a kid in the yard and I asked where are your parents.
Then I got fired from the orphanage.
Why don’t Chinese kids get to celebrate Christmas?
'Cause they're the ones making the toys.
What does an orphan and a female's mouth have in common?
They take in 100's of kids.
Your soul is black. I have 4 guns, little kid. Get in the van before I shoot you!
What do emo kids have in common with orphans?
They both depress'd on the inside.
I pushed a kid in a wheelchair and said, "Hot Wheels!"
Teacher: Your bag is heavy, what's in there?
The quiet kid: AK-47.
A retarded kid sees a murderer chopping up his latest victim with a saw. The retarded kid yells, "Seesaw!" because he sees a saw.
Teacher: What do you want when you grow up?
That depressed kid in class: Dead.
When the school shooter starts doing Fortnite dances and the autistic kid joins in.
Kid: Mom, do trees poop?
Mom: Yes. That is how we get #2 pencils.
When does a kid become an orphan?
When the parents leave.
Why do Christmas trees like wheelchairs? Because they have kids.
Why did the autistic kid walk across a busy road?
He was chasing his mind and got hit by a car.
What is an emo kid's favorite song?
"Chain Hang Low" because he hangs low off a chain tied to a tree.
What is the perfect job for a pedophile?
A physical doctor for kids.