Justice jokes
Q. If a pedophile, necrophile, and a guy who is into incest are all sitting in a car, who's driving?
A. A police officer.
A burglar breaks into the home of a weapons engineer. He wants to steal some of his weapons from his strictly secured chamber. When he breaks in through the window to go into his weapons cellar, he realizes that the inventor is at home and heard him from upstairs.
The burglar shouts, "Hands up, there is no escape!" The engineer shouts, "What do you want from me?" The thief answers impatiently, "Well, what do you think? I know what you're hiding here. Get me entry to your armory, right away!" "Never in my life will I do that!" The burglar pulls out his pistol, "Either you let me in, or you go for it!"
"Well, I'll give up, I'll give you my guns. Please don't shoot me." The burglar grins gleefully, "Thank you." "I even have a gun here that I've been working on lately. You can have it." The burglar then thinks and grunts, "Okay, before you open up, you'll show me this first!"
The inventor says, "It's shooting plasma. You can test it on one of my practice goals that I've made while I'm unlocking," and points to a side room where various dummies with targets are set up. The burglar walks into the room with the targets, focuses on the red dot in the middle of the disc, and pushes off. But the gun does not fire plasma or at the target. Instead, the gun fires a bullet at the burglar. This causes him to bleed to the ground.
The engineer behind him began to laugh, "Hahaha! I knew you were falling for it! This is not a plasma gun at all; this is my latest invention, especially for burglars like you: the backward-shooting pistol."
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Jeffrey Epstein?
Only difference between Michael and Jeffrey is Epstein wasn't a smooth criminal, and Michael was.
What do you call a child version of Batman?
The Raped Crusader.
Roses are red, Epstein's face turned blue.
Trump's on that list, And there's nothing he can do.
Trump's releasing the files.
To catch all the pedophiles.
He didn't know Epstein.
Didn't touch any teens.
Say what you want about Jeffrey Epstein, but at least he knew how to take out the trash.
What is the difference between Batman and a black man?
Batman can go out at night without Robin.
If a lawyer gives birth to a stillborn baby, is it considered a miscarriage of justice?
I asked a black man on the street if a white person paints their face black, it’s considered racist, but if a black person paints their face white, will the cops treat them better?
Why do black people only have nightmares?
Because we shot the last one that had a dream.
"Stupidity isn’t a crime, so you’re free to go."
What words black people can't say? "Thanks for your help, officer."
What type of tea does the Social Justice Warrior avoid?
Reality.
Yesterday during the storm, there was a blackout, so I shot him.
Did you hear about the guy who was arrested for stealing luggage? Unfortunately, he lost his case.
What is the difference between Nicole Brown Simpson and cancer?
OJ couldn’t kill cancer.
What's the difference between a cop and bacon?
Bacon is full of fat and makes you feel good. A cop is full of shit and will make you feel their hot steamy cock as they ram it up your ass with some justice sprinkled on top.
My son told me he wanted to be Batman when he grows up. That little shit wants to be gunned down in an alley.
When cops say you have the right to remain silent,
You're just happy you have the right to do something.