Why is a nun called a nun?
'Cause they ain't supposed to get none ;)
Joke Jokes
"Knock, knock."
"Who's there?"
"Aarghraawa."
Me, a Chinese woman, and her BFF walked into a bar. I asked the Chinese girl for her number. She said, “Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!” I said, “Wow!”
Then her friend said, “She means 666-3629.”
What did one nut say to the other nut?
A: "Candice deez nuts fit in my mouth."
What do you call the Christian version of Donald Trump? Holy shit!
Why was it wrong to throw my Chinese friend down the stairs?
What's an Asian orphan's surname? No Pham.
The next time you get a sack call, pick up the phone and say, "Welcome to Pete's pizzeria and abortion clinic. Your loss is next week's sauce. How may we help you?"
What's the difference between dark humor and morbid humor?
Dark humor is 10 babies in a trash can. Morbid humor is 1 baby in 10 trashcans.
What's the difference between acne and a priest?
Acne waits until a boy is 13 before it comes onto his face.
A guy walks into a gun store and everything is half off. He looks at his son and says, "I didn't know back to school sales started yet."
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 was a registered 6 offender.
Q: What do you call a sad soda?
A: Soda-pressing.
What does an emo kid and an apple have in common?
They both are hanging.
What if some kid was like, "I'm going to shoot up the school!", and then someone just pulls up with a reverse card?
What did the kid say to the toilet?
"Did you order a number two because I got one ready for you?"
What do you get when you stuff some cows into a food container?
A can o' bull.
Have you heard the joke about the sheep, drum, and snake?
"Baa" "dumm" "tsss"
Did you hear about the restaurant they're putting on the moon?
Good food, but no atmosphere.
Did you hear how Stephen Hawking died?
There was a mix up, and he was dropped at PC World instead of A&E!
