Joke jokes
What's an emo's favorite game? Fruit Ninja.
How did Helen Keller die?
Her ex gave her plutonium and told her to eat it.
I saw a dwarf and said, "He costs 2 elixir!"
He called the cops.
What's the difference between a dwarf and a Japanese man?
I don't know, you tell me.
If you don't like racist people, isn't that discrimination?
Why is it okay to make fun of orphans?
Because they can't tell their parents.
Me after Taco Bell, "I’m about to blow this place up like September 11."
I'd tell you a 9/11 joke, but it'd fly over your head and into the Twin Towers.
What did the doctor say to the orphan?
"I can't help you with cancer, I'm a family doctor!"
What is a group of emo kids called?
A suicide squad.
How do you stop constipation?
You scare the crap outta them.
(Crap is another word for poop.)
What are the four letters you don’t want to hear from a dentist?
I C D K
I can make a word with those: "DICK".
Why did the mushroom get a new house?
Because there wasn’t mushroom!
Did you hear about the Italian chef who died?
He pasta-way.
I just wanted to write something random.
And now my wife is dead.
Bruh, people always makin' jokes 'bout how their dad left, well in my story it was the mum that needed milk.
(Me) Hey bro, tell me a joke!
(My friend) Your mom. *Starts Laughing*
(Me) *Fakes laughs* *then points a gun at him*
At this moment, he knew he fucked up.
Today I gave a blind guy a gun and told him it was a hair dryer. Since I have no fingerprints, the police said it was suicide. I guess you can say I took care of him!
In America, you catch Pikachu. In Soviet Russia, Pikachu catches you.
I'ma tell these to my adopted sister.