Joke jokes
I'm about to go to the orphanage to tell yo mama jokes.
How do bees get to school? On a school buzz.
A skeleton walks into the hospital and said: "Doctor, Doctor, I broke my leg!" The doctor said: "I see..."
What do you say when you wake up to the police trying to arrest you?
“C'mon, did ya really think I’d resist arrest?”
What’s the difference between a dirty bus terminal and a lobster with implants?
One is a crusty bus station, and the other is a busty crustacean.
Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she has no arms.
A man once sued smart water for not making him smart. Then a woman replied, “Okay cool, now I’m going to go sue Thin Mints for not making me thin.”
Chode.
What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?
Dr. Dre.
Q. You know what really bugs me?
A. Insect puns.
What does a stick say when it falls down? "Wood you help me up?"
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Dad!
Dad who?
*Silence*
Someone asked me what the worst mistake you could make while being at work was, and I replied, "Being a doctor and mixing up the oral and rectal thermometers."
A puma was making another puma laugh. That puma that was laughing said, “Stop making me laugh! I’m gonna puma pants!”
What did Yoda say to Luke during his wedding ceremony?
"May divorce be with you."
I once read a book on antigravity, it was impossible to put down.
Why can't orphans be criminals?
Because they're never wanted.
Boy: The F in orphan stands for family.
Orphan: But there’s no F in orphan.
Boy: Exactly!
Me, haha, I'm the joke.
What hit the ground first in 9/11? The people.