Joke jokes
What’s the difference between an LGBTQ and brain cells?
Brain cells make up their mind.
These are all really nice jokes, but here is one.
Boy: Spell ME.
Girl: M-E.
Boy: You forgot the D.
Girl: There is no D in ME.
Boy: Not yet.
What’s the difference between a prostitute and a hockey player?
A hockey player gets to shower after three periods.
Q: Why can orphans swim?
A: They have or-fins.
What do you call a Mexican that smokes weed? A baked bean.
What's the best thing about fucking 21 year olds?
There's 20 of them.
What's the difference between you and an idiot? Not very much if you reword and post the same joke over and over.
There was a math teacher on a plane that crashed. What was the last thing that went through their head?
A pentagon!
(9/11 joke)
What do you call a black comedian?
Dark Humor.
Me: Tells a racist joke on the internet and no one bats an eye.
Also me: Tells the same joke at KFC and everybody loses their mind.
I got udder jokes too.
Two priests are in a bar. One says to the other priest, "I'll swap you two fives for a ten."
A cardboard belt is a waste of paper.
The irony of metal jokes is pretty fun. But it leads to a lot of people stealing them.
One time I saw a manatee all spray painted to look like a tiger. Needless to say, the first thing I yelled was, "OH! THE HUMANATEE!"
I gave a blind kid a gun and told him it was a hair dryer.
What did the pedophile say to the nutcracker?
"Aren't you a little too young to be doing that?"
At school, Bobby's classmate tells him some depressing stuff. Later that day, Bobby comes home crying and his mom greets him at the door with "Why are you crying?" Bobby says, "Someone said my grandpa died, but when did he die?" His mom looks him straight in the eye and says, "Depends, which one are you referring to?"
Do you know the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain?
So you're the one!
What do you call a black person in a dark room?
Invisible.