Joke jokes
What do you call a heterosexual man performing fellatio on another heterosexual man?
Bisexual.
Wait, isn't this Sans' job to make a joke?
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot wheels.
Kobe Bryant and 9/11 are two things I don't joke about because when I do, they tend to crash and burn.
Why doesn't Helen Keller's kid have ears? She gave it its first haircut!
Q: Why did the Koala fall off the tree? A: Because it was dead.
Q: Why did the second Koala fall off the tree? A: Because it was hit by the first Koala.
Q: Why did the third Koala fall off the tree? A: Because it thought it was a game and joined in.
There's two types of emo people:
1. People that cut side to side.
2. And people that cut up and down.
The most efficient is up and down.
What’s the difference between a prostitute and a hockey player?
A hockey player gets to shower after three periods.
Q: Why can orphans swim?
A: They have or-fins.
What do you call a Mexican that smokes weed? A baked bean.
What's the best thing about fucking 21 year olds?
There's 20 of them.
These are all really nice jokes, but here is one.
Boy: Spell ME.
Girl: M-E.
Boy: You forgot the D.
Girl: There is no D in ME.
Boy: Not yet.
Are you made of Gold, Titanium, Sulfur, Titanium, and Carbon?
Cause damn, you lookin' kinda Au Ti S Ti C!
Daughter: Mommy, what ever happened to Steven Hawking?
Mother: He died.
Daughter: How did he die?
Mother: He never got recharged.
What do you get when you cross a German and a Mexican? A “BeanerSchnitzel”!
The irony of metal jokes is pretty fun. But it leads to a lot of people stealing them.
A cardboard belt is a waste of paper.
One time I saw a manatee all spray painted to look like a tiger. Needless to say, the first thing I yelled was, "OH! THE HUMANATEE!"
Give a blind kid a gun and tell him it's a hair dryer.
Two priests are in a bar. One says to the other priest, "I'll swap you two fives for a ten."