Joke jokes
What does a piece of gum and a gun have in common?
You pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.
REALLY CRAPPY JOKE ALERT!!! Oh Quin, how was eating that tight butt? Must be nasty. I heard you met from rear ending him.
I named my dog "5 miles" so I could say I ran five miles today. I ran over 5 miles.
Why did little Susie fall off the swing?
Because she has no arms or legs.
Knock knock.
"Who's there?"
Not Susie.
What did the dick say to the condom?
Cover me, I'm going in. 😚😏
My grandpa unplugged the AC, so I unplugged his life support.
Old soviet joke.
"Who is your mother?" "Our great Soviet country." "Who is your father?" "Our dear comrade Stalin." "What's your greatest desire?" "Becoming an orphan."
Why did the depressed kid cross the road?
To get hit by a car.
How many children does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Not 27, because my basement is still dark.
Why do orphans hate knock knock jokes?
Because there is never anyone at the door.
I was thinking of a good accident joke, and I asked my sister. She said, "you."
What do you call pasta that’s made by a skeleton? A CREEPYpasta! (It’s my first one, lol)
What's the difference between a blonde and a car door? The harder you slam the blonde, the looser it gets.
What do you call an owl with armor?
A Knight Owl!
Why did Helen Keller's dog kill itself? I would too if all I heard was "daaaaaaah!"
What’s the difference between a thief and a pervert?
One will snatch your watch, the other will watch your snatch.
Why was 10 traumatized?
Because it was in the middle of 9/11.
Osama bin laden hit the towers because he couldnt fly straight
You want to hear a rape joke? Yeah. Damn you ruined it.
Why did the basketball player not get on the bus?
Because he couldn’t be caught travelling! 😂