Joke jokes
I was in Russia listening to a stand-up comedian making fun of Putin.
The jokes weren't that good, but I liked the execution.
I pushed the kid in a wheelchair into fire... I called him "HOT WHEELS".
What's the difference between depression and your ex?
Depression fucks you harder.
What does a piece of gum and a gun have in common?
You pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.
Why did little Susie fall off the swing?
Because she has no arms or legs.
Knock knock.
"Who's there?"
Not Susie.
I would tell a 9/11 joke, but it would just crash and burn.
What's an orphan's favorite part of a website?
The homepage.
Why do people come on here just to say that we should not be making these jokes? They literally look this shit up just to complain.
What do the Spanish people call child abuse? Pedrophile.
I was crying when my dad was cutting onions.
Onions was such a good dog.
What do you say to a guy with Down syndrome who’s on top of a sky scraper? "Jump!"
Yo hairline was used as the blueprint for the Great Wall of China.
You're so skinny that you use Chapstick as deodorant.
Why'd the orphan cross the road? He was told his parents were on the other side.
Why do orphans hate knock knock jokes?
Because there is never anyone at the door.
REALLY CRAPPY JOKE ALERT!!! Oh Quin, how was eating that tight butt? Must be nasty. I heard you met from rear ending him.
Why can you slap an orphan?
Are they going to tell mommy?
How many children does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Not 27, because my basement is still dark.
Why did the depressed kid cross the road?
To get hit by a car.
What do you call pasta that’s made by a skeleton? A CREEPYpasta! (It’s my first one, lol)