Joke

Joke jokes

Hole

Does your shoe have a hole in it?

No.

Then how did you put your foot in it?

Fat People

My friend made this joke (so I’m going steal it). I’m surrounded by fat people, oh wait... it’s just one.

Flash

Jeff asks, "Did you hear about the guy they call the flash?"

Bob responds, "No, I haven't. Do they call him that because he runs fast?"

Jeff replies, "Nah, they call him that because he doesn't wear pants."

Feminism

The new pandemic is feminism and all kinds of democratic thinking. COVID is a joke compared to these nasty ass diseases.

Newborn

What is the difference between a wagon filled with sand and a wagon filled with newborns?

You cannot unload the sand with a pitchfork.

Shooting Range

What's the difference between an American school and a shooting range?

My dick doesn't get hard at the shooting range.

Orphan

What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?

The apple gets picked.

Skeleton

*sans*: Why was the skeleton depressed? Because Frisk keeps resetting and it resets when he lost his phone.

Stab

"And then I said, \"Knife to meet you.\""

"You stabbed my brother!"

"It's okay, I'm in stable condition!"

Cannibal

Two cannibals have just captured a man and are about to eat him, so they cook him and lay him on a table. The first cannibal says, "You start at the bottom, I start at the top," so they both chow down.

About half an hour later, the second cannibal says, "I'm having a ball!" Then the first cannibal says, "Then you're eating too fast!"

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  • Orphan

    Why do orphans use water for cereal? Cause their dad never came back with the milk.