Joke jokes
What’s red and very rare?
A baby in a blender.
What’s the difference between dark humor and morbid humor?
Dark humor is ten kids in one container; morbid humor is one kid in ten containers.
Wanna hear a funny joke? Well, that was why you were here... Here's the joke: Your life :)
What's a paedophile's favorite footwear?
White Vans.
A lady walks into a dentist's office, sits on the counter, and spreads her legs. The dentist says, "I think you have the wrong idea." The lady replies, "Last week you gave my husband his false teeth; now you can get them out."
What did one fish say to the other?
Keep your mouth shut and you'll never get caught.
What do you call a frozen communist?
Hammer and popsicle.
Three men walk into heaven at the same time. They all live in the same city. God asks the first man, "How did you die?" The man says, "I have a heart condition, and I've been suspecting my wife of cheating for some time. Anyway, I get home from work and I see my wife on the bed and a man hanging off the balcony. I get so mad and stomp on the guy's fingers! He falls into a bush, so I throw a refrigerator on him." God asks the next man, "How did you die?" The man says, "I was cleaning the windows, and then this crazy man starts stomping on my fingers! Luckily, I fall safely in a bush! But then a refrigerator falls on me!" God asks the third man, and he says, "I was the one in the fridge!"
What's red, 6 inches long, and makes my girlfriend cry when I feed it to her?
Her miscarriage.
Why did the octopus cross the road?
To get to the other TIDE!!! 🤣🐙🐙
Why did the orphan become a prostitute?
Because they needed someone to call "daddy".
😥This is offensive, sorry: What did the king say to his royal steed? "You gonna start the dishwasher or what?"
Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone chucked a brick at her.
Why did Sally throw a clock out the window? She had brain damage from the brick.
Why the f was my shooting joke removed? It was funny, and this is obviously a website for morbid humor. WTF, I mean, worstjokesever.com. Come on...
What do you call an orphan with a boner?
Porn.
Once there was this Whichdoctor. He walked barefoot most of the time, which gave him impressive calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, and the food gave him bad breath, which made him (wait for it) a Super Callused Fragile Mystic Hexed By Halitosis.
What do you call a blonde in a freezer?
Her parents called her Cindy, so we should probably continue calling her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.
What do you call a deaf animal?
Anything, it can't hear you.
Dark humor is just like food, not everybody gets it.
Why can't a blind person eat fish?
They can't see food.