Joke jokes
What do you call an Asian telephone?
Ling Ling.
What do you call an orphan family photo?
A selfie.
But wait, what family? He never had one.
If a school shooter walks into a classroom and shoots an autistic kid, what does the kid say? "Why do I look like Swiss cheese?"
I told a joke and someone said, "no one asked." Then I said, "no one would care to even ask."
A priest, a minister, and a rabbit walk into a blood bank.
The rabbit says, "I think I'm a type-O."
What do you call a gay drive-by?
A fruit roll up.
Did you hear about the dyslexic American police officer?
He shot a Ginger.
How many dyslexics does it take to change a lightbulb?
Steven.
Yo momma is so ugly, she made my Happy Meal cry.
Some guy called me a tool. So I got hammered and nailed his girlfriend. Guess he was right.
If you give someone a plane ticket, they will fly for a day, but if you push them out of a plane, they'll fly for the rest of their life.
Guys, we need to stop making jokes about orphans. Their parents might get upset. Oh, wait... never mind.
Give a man a match, he'll be warm for hours.
Light the man on fire, he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
I’ll make a joke about homeless people, but they just don’t work.
Q: What did Chris Brown say when he first saw Rhianna?
A: I'd hit that.
How is a push-up bra like a bag of chips?
As soon as you open it, you realize it’s half empty.
Why do orphans eat water with their cereal? Because their father never came home with milk.
The last joke about the dad was a joke. Don't take it seriously. Can't believe that people actually think that was true.
I was going to make a pun about math, but my answers never add up.
What's a pirate's favorite key on the keyboard?
Others: R.
Rrrr, you would think so, but it be the C.