Joke jokes

How do you trick a homophobic heterosexual male that is a Roman Catholic priest into using the glory hole inside the men's restroom at a gay bar?

Tell him that it is a confessional booth.

What does a cannibal call a wheelchair user?

Fast food.

What do you call a crowd of horny white women?

A field of cotton waiting to be picked.

I don't understand why people get offended by incest jokes; they're so family friendly.

Hey, pass me that crowbar, please.

Sure... y’know, before the crowbar was invented, crows had to drink at home.

What do you call a dog turd in China?

Waste of food.

What’s worse than running with scissors?

Scissoring with the runs!

Did you hear about the baby with cancer? It never gets old.

I guess making 9/11 jokes at the airport is better than shouting "He's got a gun!" at the airport.

Why did the dick go insane?

Someone kept messing with his head.

What has eight legs and doesn’t rape children?

The Jackson 4.

What do you call a guy that's high in a wheelchair?

A baked potato.

You need a good place to think? You can sit on my lap, and we’ll see the first thing that pops up!

You’ve got something on your face. Wait, no, it’s just missing something. My dick.

Stop with the 9/11 jokes.

They're not gonna fly.

What does a white person say when they're surrounded by black guys? "Hey, who turned the lights out?!"

Stop with the 9/11 jokes, people. They're just not gonna fly.

I'd make a 9/11 joke, but they always crash and burn.

What do you call a midget stripper?

A pocket pussy.

Do you have a shovel? Because I'm digging that ass.