it's jokes
What's the difference between the real Jesus and a picture of him?
It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.
How do you verify a rape claim? You make it true.
What's the difference between a hooker and a mosquito?
The mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.
When is it acceptable to hit a dwarf?
When he dances with your wife and says her hair smells nice...
Where do you find a dog with no legs?
Where you left it.
When I get naked in the shower, it gets turned on.
Why are there a lot of whites in hockey?
It’s the only other job that involves beating something black other than being a cop.
Why did the library book go to the doctor?
It needed to be checked out.
Dark jokes are like a new day. Suicidal people don't get it.
Why was ten scared?
Because it was in the middle of 9/11.
Why was the ant so confused?
All of its uncles were ants.
It's not pedophilia, it's early access.
Do you know about the new movie Disney made just for cancer kids? It's called Finding Kemo.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
They can never make it home.
1. My phone battery lasts longer than your relationships.
2. Oh, you’re talking to me? I thought you only talked behind my back.
3. My name must taste good because it’s always in your mouth.
Q. How many babies does it take to shingle a roof?
A. Depends how thin you slice them.
Did you hear about the homosexual letter? It only came in male boxes.
How do you make an octopus laugh?
You give it ten tickles.
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they just arrest the lightbulb for being broke and beat the room for being black.
Q: What is the difference between a stripper and a bungee cord?
A: It's cheap, fast, and if the rubber breaks, you're pretty much screwed.