it's jokes

I had to go to the doctor for a prostate exam. When he stuck it in, I started to squirm, so he held onto my shoulder.

I thought it was going well, until he grabbed my other shoulder as well.

Yo hairline is so far back that it was there before the Big Bang happened.

Ever wondered how Jesus got rid of the cross that killed him?

Burned it in a hellish fire to make some firewood.

Did you hear about the blonde who walked into a bar?......... It hurt.

What does a pumpkin need when it's hurt? A pumpkin patch.

Why do Indians like basketball?

Because Steph Curry plays it.

Jk: Jimin, why are you so small?

Jm: Excujjimi?

Jk: No offense, Jim.

Jm: Yah, call me hyung!

Jk: But I'm bigger.

Jm: I'm older!

Jk: I'm the top and you're the bottom, so I don't think it's right to call you hyung.

Jm:......

"Dog the dog" and Maggie were frightened of her, and the kangaroo said that she had to be in a hospital with a doctor. Jokes and Maggie were walking. I was going to go off the road to the city hall to see her, and I said that the only one-piece dress for women readymade RB collection, as he was walking in the city, and Maggie was a little bit more on the side of it.

Did you hear about the guy who died by lethal injection and writhed on the stretcher for 20 minutes?

I guess it really IS all in the execution.

I'll give you an A because you're awesome.

B because you're beautiful.

A C because you're caring.

And I'll give you this D cuz you deserve it.

I'm lonely, but all I have is my cheeseburger, but what is the matter of living if you only have one thing?

But a cheeseburger is all you need 'cause it has 1,000,000,000,000 bucks man, so I can't just take it and spend it wherever I want.

Why was one afraid of every number in the world?

Because ONE wanted TWO get something THREE FOUR FIVE at the yard sale, but SIX was not there. SEVEN EIGHT NINE as well. When all but ONE remained, it got TENse.

Teacher: Why were you late?

Me: Traffic.

Teacher: Did I did it?

Me: Did I even blame it on you?

One time an ant was collecting food. Suddenly, a wind pushed the ant into the river. The ant said, "Help! Help!" and a pigeon heard it. Then, he grabbed a leaf and threw it in the river. The ant climbed on it, and then the pigeon and the ant became best friends. But one time, a hunter came to kill the pigeon. When the ant saw him, she bit his leg and the pigeon flew away from the arrow, and that's how friends are, everybody.

How many emos does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, because they just sit and cry in the dark.

Do you wanna hear a joke about vegetables? Never mind, it's too corny.

"I need help, George Sink," said Jimmy.

"What is it?" said George Sink.

"Can you wash my dishes?" said Jimmy.

Your hairline is so pushed back it looks like Will Smith slapped it back.

One dog said to the other dog, "Man, it is hard sleeping on the floor."

The other said, "Really? I like my bed."

Why does an orphan only have a Samsung? Because it doesn't have a home button!