it's jokes

What do you call it when two Mexicans fight?

Juan on Juan.

I just want to say this...

You have NO maidens, (Explosion) No homies, (ExPlOsIoN) And no—please don’t say it! Rizz 😎 (EXPLOSION)

What is it called when a gay guy punches someone?

Fruit punch.

Murder is the same as suicide, except the other person is doing it for you.

When it's been Halloween for a few months, but there's still a body hanging from your neighbor's tree.

Dream tweeted, and I quote, "Babies kick pregnant women all the time, but I do it one time and I’m the one arrested."

I'm sure you could be the smartest person in your class.

If it were a class for the profoundly retarded.

How do you make a snooker table laugh? Tickle its balls!

I found out what DNA stands for. It's the National Dyslexic's Association.

So you can't pay rent and you know you're going to get evicted, but all of the sudden you hear a knock on your door and it's your landlord, but he's naked and erect, and on his cock, it says, "Your rent is due."

Almost all of you suck. If you're following me, hah, this isn't a joke, but it gave my profile a 1 thingy heheh. KYS, Wade =D

Once upon a time, there were three kingdoms, all bordering on the same lake. For centuries, these kingdoms had fought over an island in the middle of that lake. One day, they decided to have it out, once and for all.

The first kingdom was quite rich and sent an army of 25 knights, each with three squires. The night before the battle, the knights jousted and cavorted as their squires polished armor, cooked food, and sharpened weapons. The second kingdom was not so wealthy and sent only 10 knights, each with two squires. The night before the battle, the knights cavorted and sharpened their weapons as the squires polished armor and prepared dinner. The third kingdom was very poor and only sent one elderly knight with his sole squire. The night before the battle, the knight sharpened his weapon, while the squire, using a looped rope, slung a pot high over the fire to cook while he prepared the knight’s armor.

The next day, the battle began. All the knights of the first two kingdoms had cavorted a bit too much (one should never cavort while sharpening weapons and jousting) and could not fight. The squire of the third kingdom could not rouse the elderly knight in time for combat. So, in the absence of the knights, the squires fought.

The battle raged well into the late hours, but when the dust finally settled, a solitary figure limped from the carnage. The lone squire from the third kingdom dragged himself away, beaten, bloodied, but victorious.

And it just goes to prove, the squire of the high pot and noose is equal to the sum of the squires of the other two sides.

What's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?

A mosquito stops sucking when you slap it.

How are the Twin Towers and genders similar? There used to be two, but now it's a sensitive subject.

What do you call it when a white person beats a black person?

A KKKO.

Why do squirrels love dick?

Because it produces nut.

What did the parrot say when it saw a duck?

"Polly want a quacker!"

Worst joke ever.

I wanted to tell an animal joke but it's irrelephant.

Because of all the rampant inbreeding in America, it's not a surprise that Hollywood had to poach models, comedians, and actors from Canada and Australia.

Why did the Titanic sink? It's because they didn't want the icebergs' candy.