INS jokes

What do pedophiles call children in wheelchairs?

"Meals on Wheels."

I screamed "Jenga" in history class today. We were watching a documentary on 9/11.

So, this guy and his wife figure out that she has gotten pregnant. The baby is due March 31st. Well, the guy is at work and he gets a call from his wife. She tells him she is going into labor. He rushes to pick her up, and once he is on the road, he starts speeding. Eventually, he hits another car and swerves off the road into a ditch. He wakes up in the hospital, looks around but doesn’t see his wife. He asks the doctor, "Is my wife okay? She was carrying my child." The doctor said the wife is fine and the baby is in good health. 10 seconds later he goes, "APRIL FOOLS! Your wife is dead and your child has brain damage."

Did you hear about the man who jumped off a bridge in France? He was in Seine.

Some bread teacher: What will Reddit be in a few years?

Dumb Kid: DEADit?

Bread Teacher: You get an FY for FUCK YOU!

Bread Teacher: It will be BREADit!

Student: Hah, that's VERY funny! Might as well go to DEADit so I can die of laughter.

"I've only been ripped off twice in my life. The first time was when I ordered three kebabs and they only delivered two. The second time was when we signed Cristiano Ronaldo."

-Al Nassr owner

The bears came home. Daddy bear said, "Who's been eating my porridge?" said, "Who's been in my porch?" Baby bear said, "Never mind about the porridge, who knocked the telly?"

Okay, long story fast, I walked to GameStop in my house, in the kitchen, by Walmart, to a BTS Squid Game concert, and Drake and Pablo were there for her labor in the Cowboys stadium by Nike, so I bought a pencil from a dead alive man. He said "ZOO WEE MAMA." So yeah.

French fries weren't originally cooked in France. They were cooked in Greece.

If there are 4 Mexicans in a van, which of them is driving?

None of them. Immigration service is.

Found this girl in Hawaii.

Put a stick up her ass and she said, "Ayi."

My grandpa was in 9/11. He was the best pilot.

Roses are red, I have free candy, get in my van, I have a gun handy.

Yo mama is so pretty, she could get in a car crash because boys are staring at her.

Back in Australia, my puns are high koala-tea!

My grandma stubbed her toe in an elevator on September 21st.

I would tell a 9/11 joke, but it would probably go up in flames.

Why do orphans hate going in public?

Because there's kids out with their parents.

I saw a lady in a bikini on the beach, so I walked up to her and said, "LET ME STICK MY DICK UP YOUR BIG ASS!"

What do they feed a gorilla in Paris?

Ape Suzettes.