INS jokes

I met a lewd nude in Bermuda

Who thought she was shrewd: I was shrewder;

She thought it quite crude

To be wooed in the nude;

I pursued her, subdued her, and screwed her.

What do a priest and Christmas tree lights have in common?

They can both flash.

One thing that Miles Morales and Black men have in common is that they're both rip-offs.

What do a tank and a warship have in common?

They're overweight.

Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? Why couldn't the pervert cross the road? Because his dick was in the chicken's ass!

What do you call six gay people in a war? Rainbow Six Siege.

I was sitting in class when my teacher said, "Have any questions?" the suspended Class clown said, "Who's Joe?" So the teacher said, "Joe who?" So the clown said, "Joe Mama!" So I said, "What in the BALLS?" So I ended up staying in detention with the clown, ah, so cozy!

Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light.

What do you call a nun in a wheelchair?

Virgin Mobile.

My priest asked if anyone had any questions or anything interesting they wanted to say.

So I raised my hand, he said why don’t you tell everyone what you have to say.

In front of the whole church I said I did not know Jesus Christ was the first scarecrow.

What do orphans and apples not have in common... The apples get picked up.

Yo' mama is so stupid, she couldn't find a needle in a haystack.

Yo mama is so strict that in The Outsiders, she was Darry.

A fireman, a policeman, and a carpenter went on a fishing trip. The fireman and the policeman both have the same father but different mothers, and they are half-brothers. But the fireman and the carpenter have the same mother and father, but they are not brothers. How is this possible?

Leave you answer in the comments. The answer will be revealed in 24 hours.

Teacher told me to turn in my essay, but I ain't no snitch, fool.

You're walking into a bar and you see 2 younger kids around 18. You call the manager to have them removed, but no one came down.

Later that night, you see the 2 18-year-olds, 1 was a girl and the other was a boy, so you call the manager down. No one came again. You confront them and tell them to leave, but one turns around and hits you. You are knocked out on the floor. When you wake up, there is a hard feeling in your a**. You turn your head around and there is an autistic girl with a strap-on in your a** going full on hard.

Hi guys! Ello here! So I am determined to get as many people as possible to like my jokes and comment. So, without further ado, here goes nothing!

So I have been looking at all your jokes, and UHHHHHH has not been the nicest. I don't really love the words she is choosing, but I'm not going to let her get in my head. :)

So guys make sure that you like and comment! Love y'all!!!!! :D

What did the magician do as a trick in his show?

Make your doubts about magic... DISAPPEAR!

What was Stephen Hawking's favorite line in Rambo?

"Don't push me."

John Kreese's forehead broke when silver hit 'em in the forehead.